Bella MacLeod's Twilight Fanfiction

Atonement

By BetterInTexas

Chapter 03:

BPOV

The phone rang three times. Maybe he wouldn’t answer. Would I leave a message? You can’t leave a message for something like this. Should I call him back? I stood here for 4 hours working up the courage to call him on this speaker phone. 3 hours it took for me to dial his number. My finger broke through the 6 button on the first try. Garrett brought me a new phone without laughing and offered to dial the number. I told him no. I would do this on my own.

Now an hour later and seconds of gently and slowly pushing buttons on the phone the call was going through and no one was answering.

I was sadly realizing I was feeling a great deal of relief. I was such a coward. Maybe this was a bad idea. Maybe a clean break would be best. It’s what Edward did to me. He did it willingly. I didn’t leave Jake willingly.

I prepared to hang up when the phone wasn’t ringing any longer.

“Hello?”

I wanted to say hi. Hey Jake, how ya been? I wanted to be flippant or funny. But hearing his sweet voice hit me with such force. I felt ashamed, and lonely and…

“Who is this? Why are you crying?”

I was on my knees wailing. I couldn’t stop shaking.

“J… j… :”

“Bella? Bella!? Is that you Bella?”

“Jake.” I whimpered. I wish I could jump through the phone and into his arms. He would make it all go away. He always made the bad things go away. Just like that dream catcher he made for my bed.

“Oh my God Bella. Where are you?”

Be strong Bella.

“I… I can’t tell you Jake.”

“Bella! I will never hurt you! She changed you didn’t she? I don’t care Bella. I will never hurt you!”

“I know Jake. That’s why I can’t tell you. Jake, I did things. I do things. I can’t… I wanted to come to you and beg for death but… I didn’t want you to see me like this.”

“Bella I wouldn’t have… it’s not your damn fault. I’m so damn sorry…”

“No. No it’s my fault. I should have come to you. Let your pack kill me. But Jake I was scared. Do you know what I was scared of? I didn’t want Paul or Leah’s face to be the last one I saw. The sneer saying he leech lover got what she deserved. Now people are dead because I wasn’t strong enough to go to the one place I could have found death.”

“Nobody will ever hurt you Bella. Nobody.”

“That’s the problem Jake.”

“Bella come to me. Meet me somewhere. We can go off. I can help you. We can hide.”

“Jake, your every instinct would be to kill me. You know it.”

“I’ll fight it Bella. I thought you were dead. Why did you wait so long to call me?!”

“I was… living in the wild Jake. I was afraid to come near people. I still am. I’ve killed people Jake.”

“Not your fault B…”

“Yes it is! I’m a damn monster. I got what I asked for Jake. Isn’t that right? Tell me!”

Calm down Bella. Please calm down.

“Bella I’m not going to say I told you so. You didn’t ask for that. Is she… is she still around? She stopped coming here after she grabbed you.”

“No. Edward killed her.”

“Edward Cullen? Did he find you Bella? Are you… with him now?”

“No Jake. I… I can’t tell you where I am. But I found someone. A vampire who doesn’t hurt people.” At least US citizens.

“He is helping me. He is going to help me not kill people.”

“Is he a Cullen?”

“No. He’s…” government agent? Superhero? “a nomad.”

“Why is…”

“Jake, wait. I have to know.” I didn’t want to know but I had to.

“He’s… he’s not good Bella. Nobody wanted to fake your death. We hoped we could get you back. Then when we realized it wasn’t going to happen, it was too late…”

“So he thinks…”

“You’re missing.” Oh God no.

“He’ll never quit looking will he?” I whispered.

“It doesn’t look like it Bella. But he has no leads. Nothing. He’s… he’s been drinking a lot. Bella he’s not doing well.” Jake sighed.

“My… my Mom?”

“Bella look you got…”

“My mother Jacob? How is my mother?”

“I don’t know. I mean…”

“You know.” I told him firmly. Pull off the damn band aid Jake.

“She is… she checked into a hospital because of severe depression and attempted suicide. She tried to kill herself. Phil saved her and placed her in a hospital. She… shes getting better. Bella she will get better.”

Dear God.

“How long ago was this Jake?”

“About 6 months after you disappeared Bella.” He said softly.

“Bella come to me. Meet me. Please. I want to see you.”

“No. You really don’t Jake. Everything you said about leeches was true. We are dead. Soulless. At least I am. I don’t want you to see me like that. I want your last memory of me to be underneath you on the couch in your shed.”

“Bella please…”

“No Jake. I never realized how much you meant to me when I was alive. I used you to get over a guy who didn’t deserve my attention. I’m not going to ruin your life any longer to make me feel better about what I am. I called you to tell you goodbye and thank you for everything you did for me. You really were the sunshine in my life. I love you Jake. Be happy.”

I ended the call before he could say anything else.

I missed his voice already. It sounded like home. A home I could never go back to. I heard a strange sound and realized it was myself, sobbing. I also realized I was on my knees. I needed to get up. I needed to be stronger. Stop crying and get to work. Take advantage of this chance I have been given. I will. I will get up.

Later.

GPOV

“This is not good.” I said more to myself.

I was currently going over every source of information I had about Renee Dwyer, Jacob Black, and Charlie Swan. Renee was still in a mental hospital in Florida. Charlie Swan was still chief of police in Forks but… pictures of him in the Forks paper lately show a man who has aged very quickly and not well compared to pictures of him in the paper over a year ago.

I had little information on Jacob Black. His father died recently. Heart attack apparently. He was attempting to get loans to start a small business with two of his friends. Pack members I am guessing.

The problem was, if Bella talked to Jacob he would tell her about her mother and father. This would destroy her. She has a conscience. She took responsibility for a vampire kidnapping her and turning her against her will. She will certainly take responsibility for this.

Bella. She was intriguing. Such an innocent soul tainted by darkness. The stain will always be there. Perhaps it should. I believe no one should go through life completely innocent. That simply means you have not lived. Our scars make us what we are just as much as our positive attributes do. I certainly had enough scars.

Still though I had to remember she was 18 and had not lived life very much. This was the time she would be spreading her wings and learning who she was. Unfortunately she has not had the opportunity to do this.

I needed to keep her busy. Training. Focusing on blending in with humans. Field trips to places people hung out. Feeding. Keeping her well fed at all times would be a good idea. She would need to be tested around a human with a cut that she wasn’t expecting. Who could I get to volunteer for that?

Connolly. That dumbass would relish the idea.

An alert came across my screen at the same time I heard his door open and his shower start. Of course he left the door open. I should probably mention to him that our bachelor pad has become a female friendly residence.

But… this was interesting. Carp Lake had a few people missing lately. There were also three sightings of the Lake Leelanua monster. That creature hasn’t been sighted in years, making me think whatever people are seeing is not a that particular lake monster. This makes me wonder about shape shifters. Aquatic ones. Perhaps I should remember to mention to Bella that not all shape shifters are as nice as her wolf pack. I checked the rest of the briefings.

Nothing of importance showed up. It may be a good time to check on the Michigan lake and determine if shape shifters have been killing people, using the history of the lake to hide their activities. First things first. I had to get her to act human.

I may have to negotiate with her to motivate her. No. I wouldn’t manipulate her like that. I already knew what I would be doing.

What was I planning on… oh yes. Talking to Ty. I rose to go to his room when I heard it. A scream to end all screams.

BPOV

I finally got off my knees and decided to see what I could do about controlling my blood lust and blending in with humans. I also needed to talk to Garrett about using an unclaimed body to possibly fake my dead body being found. Perhaps if my parents have closure that may help?

I walked out into the hall and smelt a strange scent. Before I could stop myself I collided with the scent. I stepped back hissing. A large black vampire stood before me. The towel I am guessing was around his waist was piled at his feet. He was naked. Very, very naked.

Garrett wrapping me in his arms brought me back to reality and allowed me to stop screaming.

“Damn shortie. You ain’t ever seen a big glorious cock before or what? He don’t bite. You ain’t got to be scared.”

What the hell?

“Uh…”

Garrett tried to introduce me to the vampire who was still standing naked in the hall way.

“Bella this is…”

“Tyrone Gavin ma’am. You can call me Ty.” He reached his hand out. I backed away into Garrett a little bit.

“Ty!”

“Yeah G Man?”

“Towel?”

“Oh, my bad.”

Ty bent over and picked up his towel, wrapping it around his waist.

“I… I’m Bella. Bella Swan.”

“Nice to meet you shortie. Glad to see G Man picked him up a woman. He been alone so long I was beginning to get scared to walk around naked around here. Just in case he got desperate.”

“Ty I would have much higher standards than you. Bella, Ty is the other vampire I told you came to me 5 years ago much the same way you did. Ty, Bella was turned last year. She came here looking to expose the vampire world just like you did.”

Ty’s face became serious.

“Welcome to the team Bella. It’s been a bromance up to this point. We got us a regular Mod Squad now.”

“Mod Squad?” I quietly asked, confused.

“You ain’t ever seen the Mod Squad? We got us the white dude, the good lookin black guy and now we got the chick. It’s all working out. I just need to find me a sweet piece of ass and we could have neighborhood barbecues and shit.”

“Ty why don’t you come to the control room and you can tell Bella and I about your mission. Give her an idea about the kind of work we do.” Garrett suggested. I noticed his arms were still around me. It should bother me but it didn’t. I hadn’t been held in so long. I guess Garrett realized it at the same time and took his arms away.

“Cool.”

Half a second later we were in the control room. Ty hadn’t gotten dressed. Still. They were sitting. I was standing. Ty crossed one leg over another… oh God there it is again.

“Seriously girl. You ain’t ever seen a cock before?”

“Ty! Manners! Bella is a lady.”

“How old are you girl?”

“18.” I whispered. “And I have seen a… cock. Plenty. I mean not that many but the average amount of… you know… cock.”

“I’m callin bullshit on this one G Man.” Ty said. Garrett smirked.

“Have a seat Bella.” Garrett offered. I sat, not knowing what else to do.

“Did you find him?” Garrett asked Ty.

“I wouldn’t be back if I hadn’t. Found him and his boys, hanging out in a small mountain range. Even painted his ass with a laser. Drone dropped a big ass missile on their ass and tent city turned to ash city. It was beautiful G Man. I wish you could have been there. They was doing target practice when it hit. Shootin US flags if you can believe that shit. The irony was delicious my man.”

“Excellent work Ty. Bella, I told you Ty was looking for a certain terrorist cell leader. Once he found them he passed on the information and then used a laser to guide a drone missile to destroy not just him but the entire camp. He…”

“Oh that wasn’t all I did.” Ty grinned.

Garrett sighed. “What else did you do Ty?”

“So right before these fuckers fry I step out in the open. I’m about 400 yards away and I shoot the finger at these fuckers while painting their ass. They turn and start firing and I’m standing there taking these bullets and laughing my ass off right? A couple of these fuckers must think I’m a god or something cause they fall to the ground and start doin that worshippin thing, on their knees with the hands…”

“Yes. I know Ty.”

“Anyway. The Drone flys in silent like and they hear it but it’s too late to do anything but kiss your ass goodbye. So I stand there when the missile hits.”

“You stood there?” I asked. He was still alive. Damn, it appeared nothing could kill us.

“Yep. So the wall of fire is rolling towards me and I raise my arms over my head and let it roll over me. There I am Bella. Stretched out in the desert as a wall of fire envelopes me. My clothes burn off of course. So it’s over and I’m surrounded by nothing but ruins, standing completely naked in the desert. It was amazing Bella. Shoulda been there shortie.”

“I’m sorry I missed it.” I mumbled.

“No sweat kid. We got lots of missions to do for many, many years. You will get your shot at seeing me basking in the glow of victory completely naked. It would probably be too much for you to handle right now. Especially since my cock is the first one you ever saw.”

“It is not!” I countered.

“Yeah. It is. I’m sorry G Man.”

“For what?” Garrett asked.

“I set the bar too high. She is gonna think all cocks are supposed to be this perfect.” Ty said solemnly.

“I had sex. He was gorgeous. Stop it already. What does he care anyway?” I was starting to get pissed off.

“My bad shortie. I got no doubt that you are a woman of the world.”

“Then why are you giving me shit?” I growled. Garrett tensed.

“Cause our rooms are soundproof but sometimes certain muffled sounds slip through the vents. I thought I heard sobbing. I knew it wasn’t him. I figured it might be you. If it was you I figured you could use something to take your mind off what got you so upset. So…”

“So you made sure that I walked into you and your towel fell?” I asked.

“Yep.”

“Why?”

“Cause I’d rather you be pissed than sad. Pissed makes you focused. Sad makes you despair. Nothing good comes out of despair. Welcome to the family Bella.” Ty smiled.

I wanted to hug him at the moment. I didn’t. But I wanted to. I actually laughed.

“Ty, could you do me a favor?”

“What ya got G Man?”

“Bella needs help adjusting to acting human. She also needs to learn how to fight.”

“Fight what?” Ty asked.

“Everything.” Garrett told him seriously.

“Cool. You ever been in a fight Shortie?”

“No.” I admitted.

“Damn girl. You can’t really learn anything about yourself until you have been in a fight. We got to get you some scars.”

“I got scars. Trust me.” I rubbed the one on my wrist that hadn’t gone away with my other imperfections during the change. Figures.

“Bella I hate to leave you but I promise I will be back in a few days. You have the phone in your room. Let Ty know when you want to talk to me and he will dial me or you can try it yourself. Work on your touch. Acting human. Getting used to the smell of blood in your room and controlling your feeding. Work on fighting. Your books should be in tomorrow. Ty when they arrive could you get them? This place is a human free zone for about a week or so.”

“No problem Garrett. I will take care of her.” He nodded.

“Where are you going Garrett?” I didn’t like the idea of him being gone. It made me uncomfortable.

“Mission. Very important. Very delicate. I need to fix some things before lives are lost. It’s what we do Bella. Remember that. It’s what you are now.”

I nodded. It would be nice to save someone instead of ruining them. I watched Garrett walk out and already missed his soothing presence. I hoped he wouldn’t be gone long. I wanted to spend more time with him. I guess I can get to know… Fuck!

I picked my ass off the ground. I turned and saw Ty with his fists up hopping from one foot to another.

“Teach her to act human Ty. Get her books. Let her dial the phone. Boring. Boring as fuck. You wanna learn kung fu shortie?”

“Yeah. Yeah I do.” I grinned.

“Good. I figure we got about 72 hours before Garrett shows up. I’m gonna beat your ass for 71 and a half of those hours.”

He was smirking. Okay.

“Bring it bitch. Training room?”

“Right this way Bella.”

GPOV

“Your credentials check out sir but you don’t look like a typical federal agent if you don’t mind me saying so. Would you please take off your sunglasses?”

“You really don’t want to see my eyes, Dr. Loomis. You don’t want to remember my face, what I am wearing and you sure as hell don’t want to ever mention that I was here or who I was here to see. This is a national security matter. That’s my ID. You do what I say or get transported to Guantanamo Bay. We understand each other?”

“You can’t talk to me like that.”

Fine. I took off my glasses and bore my red eyes into his green ones.

“Look me in the eyes and tell me what I can and cannot do Dr.”

I think he just pissed himself. I think I have pretty eyes. Humans don’t always agree.

“Right this way sir.”

I followed his pompous ass down a long hall. At the end of the hall we stopped at a door.

“She doesn’t talk much and she is suicidal. I am afraid I will…”

“If you insist on being present I have no problem with that. However due to the nature of our conversation I will have to place you in custody for an indeterminate period of time. Due to knowledge you possess.”

“Indeterminate?”

“Yes, like I throw you under a fucking rock and forget you are there for the next fifty years. Was that your Porsche outside? It looks fun to drive. I bet you have a nice life. You want to keep it you are going to open this door and run away. Run far away. Understand?”

“Yes.” He whispered. The door unlocked and Loomis did indeed run.

I walked slowly inside and saw her sitting in a rocking chair staring out the window. She looked like hell.

“It’s not time for medication.” She mumbled. Still her voice was clear.

“Are you crazy?” I asked.

“What?” She asked, turning finally.

“Are you crazy?” My glasses were back on my face. I had to be sure she wasn’t mentally unstable.

“No.” She sighed. “I’m not crazy. I just don’t want to live any longer. Who the hell are you?”

“Why do you not want to live any longer?”

“I let my daughter run off to her father’s to make me happy and it killed her. She did it to make me happy. I was selfish. The only good thing I ever did in my life was having her. But I was self centered. More concerned about my new husband. I was ready to miss her Prom, dates, breakups and loves. Then she was gone. It wasn’t fair that she was gone and I was here. So, I want to die. But I fucked that up. I suppose it’s what I deserved.”

“So you feel incredible guilt and it has made you want to die?”

“Yeah. That’s what I said. Who the hell are you?”

“I need you to be certain you are not crazy. Because the story I am about to tell you will make you think I am. If you ever repeat this story they will lock you up forever so you have to keep this to yourself.”

“What do I care if I ever get out?”

“Because she can’t come here to see you. She shouldn’t have to. You need to get better. When you are, I will have her ready. Ready to see you again. You need to be ready as well.”

“Who can’t come to see me?” She whispered.

“Bella. I met her two days ago. She is not dead. But she can’t be around people right now. Not yet. Soon.”

“You’re lying.” She was getting angry. I kneeled in front of her chair and took off my glasses.

“I give you the same pledge I gave her. I will always be honest with you. Renee, my name is Garrett. I am a vampire. Would you like to hear the most incredible story, and learn what your daughter is doing now?”

Her eyes filled with tears but she was not yelling at me to get out. Her face had a myriad of emotions. Finally the one I was looking for. The one I have been trying to keep on Bella’s face.

Hope.

“You’re not going to lie to me?”

“No.”

“You’re a vampire?”

“Yes. I would be glad to drink Dr. Loomis’s blood if that would help prove it to you.” She laughed. A start.

“I think I would like to hear this story, Garrett.” She whispered, a large tear rolling down her cheek.

“Good. After this I have a trip to make to Washington State. Then I must get back.”

“Why the hurry?”

“The sooner I get back the sooner I can help her prepare to see you. I can also get you sprung from this place so you can go home and talk to her on the phone.”

That caught her attention.

“You’re not fucking around are you? Your eyes… they are red. I can tell by your eyes that you are honest.”

“Are you ready to hear about your daughter? She has been through a lot. She will need you as much as you need her.”

“Tell me.”

I smiled. And I told her.