Bella MacLeod's Twilight Fanfiction

Seeing Red

By BetterInTexas

Chapter 12: Reunions

“Stop running!”

Barry slowed down, not wanting a sudden start to jar the not so small little boy on his back. Even at eleven years old, the man knew Clark would grow to be large. Large may be an understatement considering his Kryptonian genes.

Once he had come to a halt, Clark jumped off his back and vomited his breakfast on the ground. Barry tried not to watch, the sight making him nauseous, as it often did when John Diggle vomited after being moved by the Flash.

“You okay?” he asked, the child.

Eliza and Jeremiah had agreed to let Clark run with Barry cross country, provided he stayed on Barry’s back the entire time. Clark was not happy about this but if it meant a chance to see Kara and not have to deal with the hassle of an airport then it was worth it.

The little boy was now reconsidering his decision.

“No, I am not okay! Do you think people who puke are generally okay? Kara ran with me all the time. She runs smooth, like she is gliding. You run like your feet are made of stone. I’ll take it from here. Try to keep up.”

Barry hid a smile, not wanting to patronize the boy.

“Do you know the way to Kentucky?” he asked.

Clark nodded his head and pointed up.

“Kara taught me to navigate by the stars.”

Barry looked where Clark was pointing.

“I hate to break this to you but its morning. No stars are out.”

“None that you can see.” the little boy countered. “As long as we stay away from the main roads we will be good. Try and keep up with me and you won’t have to worry about your friend giving you directions in your ear. I found the coordinates on Google Earth before we left. I know exactly where we are going.”

Barry shook his head. “No deal. Your Mom and Dad said you could only come with me if you rode on my back. It isn’t easy for me either, you know? You aren’t exactly a lightweight.”

Clark grinned.

“Afraid you can’t take me, Flash? Don’t want to lose that fastest man alive title? There is a large Oak tree two miles away. If you can beat me there I will let you take me the rest of the way, even if it is going to take an hour at the speed you are running.”

“No.” Barry told him. Clark shrugged his shoulders.

“Thats cool. If I was in your position I wouldn’t want to be beat by an eleven and a half year old. I think I will just walk. Why don’t we go to the nearest city and catch a plane? I mean fly in one. Only me and Kara can actually catch planes.”

The Flash grinned, used to Clark’s good natured ribbing by now, even if the little boy did think he was faster.

“Fine. If you make it to this Oak tree before I do, you can run the rest of the way. If I get there first you get on my incredibly sore back and be quiet. No complaining for the rest of the thirty minute trip.”

“Wow, you do have a pair. Impressive, Flash. I can’t wait to tell Kara I left you in the dust, or… clay, rock? No, its more like… is all of Texas like this?”

“Pretty sure its just North Texas. This is my first trip though. So an Oak tree, huh? Shouldn’t be hard to find considering the lack of trees but we have to stay away from roads. You can’t be seen. For God’s sake, be careful. If you run into something and get hurt I will be running from your parents for the rest of my life.”

“Nah, Alex would get to you first. You may be fast but she is tricky. Ready? Of course you are.”

Clark took off, running across the mostly barren landscape towards a small group of trees Barry could barely see. The Flash took off after him, passing him in seconds, but impressed with his speed. The boy could move. Barry knew Kara was fast enough in the air to create vortexes to put out fire. Clark wasn’t far behind it appeared but he was still vulnerable at times.

The look on the little man’s face was hilarious when he saw Barry running next to him. The Flash gave the kid a wink and took off.

Only to be tripped a few feet from the tree in question. Barry fell flat on his face, while a laughing Clark flew over him, very close to the ground and touched the tree.

“Loser!”

The man looked at the ground and saw a fence post had tripped him up. Where the hell had a fence post came from? Gazing back over their path, he could tell a barbed wired fence was wrecked.

“Did you seriously just pull a fence post from the ground and throw it at my legs?”

The title boy shrugged his shoulders. “The bet was I would get here first. I did, I won.”

“You cheated!”

“I won. Next time be more clear in the rules. Its not like I broke your legs or anything. I’ve gotten pretty good with my aim. So I guess we will be running side by side the rest of the way.”

Clark began laughing, then turned, to take off running. He made it two steps before he hit the tree trunk in front of him and fell on his butt.

Now it was Barry who couldn’t stop laughing. Clark didn’t find it funny.

“You will never tell anyone about this.” he ordered, standing up.

“You seriously think I would not tell someone about this? You just walked into a large tree using super speed. No way I keep this to myself.”

Clark could feel his cheeks burning from embarrassment. If Alex found out he would never live it down. Then it occurred to him how he could handle this situation. Years of manipulating his mother and father had taught him many skills.

“You won’t say anything because if you do, Mom and Dad will find out you didn’t run with me the entire way. I am sure when I explain to them that your back was hurting and you asked me to run along side of you, they will understand.”

Barry took a long look at the boy. He knew those eyes. Those were the eyes of a kid who was not bluffing. Perhaps living with Kara so many years had taught him to be very good at deception and manipulation.

He immediately felt horrible thinking of that. Kara was not a liar.

Okay, so she probably lied sometimes but it was always for the greater good. She was honest to a fault.

Which made no sense, considering her family had to force her into rehab. She had done considerable damage to herself. The Flash knew this because Caitlin was not called on a whim. If she was needed and left in the middle of the night, it was serious. He doubted Bruce Wayne gave away the kind of money he did on a whim, no matter how much the man was worth. Barry had no doubt they knew about Kara’s drinking but was it worse than he guessed? She was indestructible. How could something like alcohol affect her that much?

No, her family may have known but he had an idea they didn’t know everything. It only made sense. Remembering her eyes the last time he saw her, it was obvious she was manic. The suicide attempts and the drinking, who knew what else she had done.

He still couldn’t get her off his mind. No matter what she did or who she was, Barry would never get over her, no matter how much she tried to push him away. She had taken him to her secret base in Antarctica that night to have sex with him. She wanted to put him in the same position as Nightwing and he knew he would have given her what she wanted. Would he be her new escape? Was that her only interest in him?

He didn’t want to think about it. Once he arrived, he would watch Clark go down and stay up top. If Kara wanted to see him, he would jump at the chance. If not he would give her more time. She may decided she wants nothing to do with him after she is better and though the thought hurt, it was better than either of the other alternative, her continuing to kill herself and using him as a tool to help maintain a facade of normalcy while she did it.

“You are thinking about her, huh?” Clark asked but it really wasn’t a question.

“Yeah.” Barry admitted, standing up.

“I have been thinking about her since she has been gone. I’m pretty scared. I don’t know what she will be like. I know she is probably mad at Mom and Dad for doing what they did. She is probably mad at Alex too. I don’t know how she will feel about me. I don’t care about school. I’m not leaving her. She has never left me and I won’t leave her.”

‘I know you won’t.” the man agreed. “She wants to see you, or she wouldn’t have asked you to come. Me, I am not so sure about, but I guess I will find out in thirty minutes.”

“If your back can hold out.” the little boy reminded him. “I’ll run on your back since you are slightly faster than me right now. Just do me one favor. Don’t tell here what she wants to hear. Thats all Nightwing did. Thats why Dad really didn’t like him. He never told her to stop, or anything. He would drink with her. When she complained about people thinking she had problems he agreed with her. Maybe I should have asked her before to get help. When I was younger she would get really mad at me if I brought anything up about her. I always thought she was crazy when I was younger. I wish I hadn’t done it. I don’t know the whole story. I am going to find out, but something changed her.”

“Whats that?” the man asked, intrigued by the observations of Kara’s behavior.

The little guy shrugged his shoulders.

“I don’t know. I’ve seen videos in the Fortress of me as a baby. Kara was always taking care of me but she did’t mind. She smiled. She was happy. I think she found out some things, some bad things and keeps it hidden from me. Whatever she knows, I have a feeling I am not going to like it. I think it is why she is the way she is.”

Clark shook his head, stopping the train of thought. Nothing else mattered except getting to Kara right now. Telling Barry it was time to go, the two took off, the Flash and his passenger. In another thirty minutes to an hour he would be with Kara. Nothing would get in his way.

“Fine.” the Flash gave in. “But you are riding with me. Or I can call your parents and tell them I run to rough for your liking and…”

“I get it. Lets go.”

The Block

Kara was in the training area on the fourth level, doused in red sunlight so she could let loose on the training dummy, the girl was currently pummeling. She knew her drug regiment started this afternoon and was not sure how she would feel for the foreseeable future. She had tried to sleep but couldn’t, tossing and turning all night. Alex sat up with her, and sat with her this morning, trying to watch TV but the blonde was too restless, unable to stop pacing in the room.

Kara claimed to be bored but that was not the problem and her family knew it. The girl may have gotten over withdrawals but the psychological need was still there. For the first time in a very long time she was without any alcohol or drugs in her body and had no idea what to do. Though the tremors had stopped, she still fidgeted and felt the need to move constantly, talking herself into and out of this mess the entire time in her head. Alex was the one who suggested the training room. It had been built to study the effects of the medications on Kara’s reflexes. Instead it was working as stress relief, or at least lessening the stress.

She had worked up a sweat, throwing blocks and punches at the padded wooden dummy, going through a series of strikes and counter strikes Dante had taught her what seemed ages ago.

While doing these Kara tried not to think about Dante and what she had said and done to him. It was probably one of the things Kara felt the most ashamed of, or at least in the top ten. It should have been a warning that she and her life had gotten completely out of control. Instead she blamed him and drove him away, forbidding him from ever seeing her again. Dante had conceded to her wishes and had not seen or spoken to her in nearly two years.

Snapping out of those thoughts, she moved towards the heavy bag and began a series of kicks until the door opened. Though without her powers, Kara could guess who it was. Her parents were working with her doctors and Alex was catching up on sleep. J’onn had flown to National City after speaking to her for twenty minutes, so he could close things there, hand over the DEO and begin making appearances as her once in a while. That left the one man she had not spoken to yet. She had seen him with her X Ray vision on the lowest level, spying on the world, speaking with the CEO of his company a few times, never long. Bruce didn’t give a damn about Wayne Industries. Lucius Fox handled the business and Bruce Wayne focused on his mission in life.

Kara did not turn to look at him, but did stop hitting the bag.

“You were supposed to kill me.” she told him. “I told you if I ever got out of control…”

“To stop you.” he finished.

“We both know what I meant. There is only one way to stop me. That was your job.”

“I’m not a straight razor, Kara. Sorry, but you of all people should know that stopping doesn’t mean killing, not to me.”

Kara turned around finally and looked at him. She was surprised. Looking down on him from above she hadn’t seen his face. Now she wondered when the last time he had any sleep was. The man looked like hell.

“You make exceptions for aliens, remember?”

“You’re not an alien. You are my friend. I don’t have many, and I was not going to watch one kill herself.”

Kara walked closer to the man and pushed his chest, barely tipping him back.

“I hate cages! You of all people should know why! I would rather be dead than in a cage!”

Bruce silently agreed but did not apologize.

“This place was built to help us. I never told you because I was hoping to catch you when you weren’t drunk. I missed my five minute window somewhere I suppose. I commissioned it and hired Veritas because I thought if the Government did actually find a way to harm you, it would have to be biological. I needed to know how to fight that, if they made you sick. It would also give us an advantage if Brainiac ever showed up, as we discussed. If Waller or someone else developed a virus that could harm or kill you, I was not going to wait around for the DEO to figure out how to treat you. Assembling a team of the best biological warfare experts in the world at a moment’s notice in the event a skull shaped ship appeared orbiting the Earth didn’t seem prudent. I like to be prepared. This was never meant to be a prison. From what I understand you had the choice of leaving yesterday. You didn’t. That means this isn’t a prison. You are here now of your own free will.”

Kara said nothing, instead turning and walking towards the wall where a towel hung. She was only dressed in a sports bra and yoga pants and threw her t shirt on as well. Hair in a ponytail, drenched in sweat, she knew she looked as bad as she felt but did not give a damn at this moment.

“You were supposed to kill me.” she whispered again.

“Then maybe you should have asked Oliver Queen to stop you. I would have stopped him if he tried though. Your family needs Kara Danvers.”

“And the world needs Supergirl.” Kara countered.

She was irritated when Bruce shook his head, and walked towards the heavy bag. Taking off his dress shirt, he began swinging himself. Kara, as always, was impressed with the power his human body could put into strikes. One would almost think he was metahuman if they did not know how obsessively he worked out.

“The world has not had Supergirl in a week. Guess what? It is still turning and shows no signs of deviating from its normal path around the sun. The world survived before us, before you. It will survive long after we are gone. We try to do the best we can but thats it. You are no god and I am certainly not an angel. We are just two people with amazing abilities to blame ourselves for things that aren’t our fault and punish ourselves for them constantly. Thats fine. We can tell each other the world needs us but we do what we do to battle our own demons. You know it, I know it and your family knows it.”

A sudden spin kick from Bruce sent the bag flying off its chain, crashing to the floor with a thud.

“Great.” Kara muttered. “I’m kind of limited on what I have down here so if you could not break the equipment that would be nice. Why are you even here?”

“Because my partner is.” he answered. “I understand you are beginning to take medications today and there will be possible side effects until they can find the right fit so to speak. While you are taking these meds you are going to be monitored and tested, poked at, prodded and will be bored, making life hell on the people who are paid to help you and your family. On the first level, just under the cabin, is a large empty space. It was supposed to be an armory. I had an employee searching the US and European junk yards for a birthday gift for you last month. I know you like to put together things that are broken. They don’t get much more broken than the one he found in Wales. A 1949 Vincent Black Lightning that has seen better days. I thought if anyone could make something of it, you could. You have always been good at bringing broken things back to life. Restoring it will give you something to do while you try to bring yourself back to life.”

Kara shook her head, making sure she heard that correctly under these red lights.

“You found a 49 Vincent Black Lightning that isn’t already owned by a collector? Thats impossible.”

“So is a person flying but you seem to have that down. The bike and tools you will need will be delivered this afternoon.”

Bruce walked to a cooler in the corner and poured a cup of water. “Dick asked about you. I wasn’t sure what you wanted him to know so I told him you were fine. I guess considering what happened in the last encounter the two of you had, calling him is out of the question? I know what he is and isn’t to you Kara, but he has been your friend and does care about you.”

Kara rolled her eyes and poured her own cup of water.

“I never should have started having sex with him.” Kara admitted. “I should have just picked you to have casual sex with. You aren’t as clingy.”

Bruce spit the water in his mouth onto the floor, causing Kara to actually laugh for the first time since she arrived here.

“You could have asked me. I would never turn down a no strings attached liaison with a 19 year old blonde.” a new voice told her. Kara spit out the water she had drunk on the floor, seeing it was Alfred who walked in.

Wiping her mouth, ignoring Bruce’s laughter now, she fixed the older man with a hard look.

“Stay where you are. I want to frisk you for syringes. It would be the most action you have had in decades I imagine.”

Alfred shook his head sadly. “Dear, you have no idea how off your estimate is. It has been much, much longer, but I recently found a singles website that shows promise. I hope you aren’t too upset about me drugging you. He made me do it.”

“You use that excuse all the time. I don’t know how I feel about either of you, to be honest. I have small bombs planted in the Batcave and on all your hardware I have worked on so I guess the two of you will find out at some point. I had to have some way to stop both of you if you went out of control.”

Bruce stiffened but then relaxed. Kara was joking.

She had to be joking.

He would run diagnostics on everything just to be sure.

“Master Wayne, I would like a few minutes of Kara’s time to speak to her privately, if she would agree.”

Bruce nodded his head, patted Kara roughly on the back, ruffled the hair on her head annoying her, and walked out. The blonde was surprised. Alfred never asked to speak to her alone. She wasn’t sure he ever had. Yes, the two talked often but it seemed Bruce or Alex, or even Dick was always present.

“Whats up?” she asked carefully.

“You and Bruce know quite a bit about each other.” Alfred started. “Honestly, I think you are the one Bruce feels a kinship with the most. Dick has had similar events happen in his life and the two of them share an obvious bond but the two of you understand each other on a different level. The two of us have some similarities as well, one you may not know about.”

“Oh really? Do tell.” she told him, suspecting one of his dry jokes that she loved.

“I loved a woman once, deeply. She was murdered. I… for a long while afterward, I found solace in a bottle. I hid it well, I learned to cope because another was depending on me. I had to be the adult, the mother, the father, the protector. Eventually I was alone for a few years and I no longer had to keep up appearances. I lost myself completely in the bottle. A friend of mine you know, Jim Gordon, was the one who pulled me out of the grave I had dug for myself. He insisted I move in with him, his wife and daughter for six months. During that time he took me to AA meetings after work and if he couldn’t get away his wife would go with me until eventually I started going on my own. I relapsed several times but they never gave up on me. Bruce knows none of this, and I would prefer if he never did.”

Kara stood very still, listening to the man. He seemed to be talking less to her than himself, reliving a difficult time in his life.

“Every time I would relapse, I thought I would have driven him away but I never did. He and his wife never gave up on me. Eventually I moved back into the large mansion, Bruce came back and he never knew what had happened. I have been sober for fifteen years now and every day is a battle, not helped by the lifestyles we lead. Everyday I want nothing more than to pour a glass of Scotch or a nice Merlot and then another and another. Just as we all have our battles to fight to save the world, we have our own important battles to fight within ourselves. As long as I live, I will be there by your side in this battle. Nothing you will do nor have ever done will ever be as hard as what you are about to do. I believe in you. Jim did not give up on me, no matter what I did. I won’t give up on you, no matter what happens. Don’t give up on yourself.”

Alfred uncharacteristically pulled the shocked girl into a hug which she eventually returned. The man gave her a sad smile and moved towards the door.

“Alfred?” Kara stopped him. “The woman you loved, she was murdered in an alley, wasn’t she?”

The man gave a sad grin and nodded his head. “I won’t bother to ask you to keep that to yourself. I know you will. I will be here the entire time you are. If you need anything just ask. I understand Clark will be here soon. I think Barry Allen has run across country with him.”

“Thats good, I really want to talk… did you say Barry Allen? Barry is here?! No! He can’t see me… no!”

Alfred smirked at her. “You should probably take a shower. It can never hurt to have too many friends, Kara. You need as large a support system as you can find. If you don’t want to see him he will understand but you did tell him everything and he is still here. I think he could be a friend to you. Don’t turn people away who only want to help. There aren’t enough of those kind in this world. No battle can be won alone. Not Myriad and not this one.”

Kara left the red lights and ran toward the shower in her room. Without the red lights she was able to hurry but also able to hear everything. She heard him upstairs, telling Barry to wait. She heard her mother in the elevator hugging Clark. She heard the door close and the elevator drop.

Barry hadn’t come inside. Why would he run Clark all the way here and not want to see her?

He wasn’t sure if she would want him to see her. He probably had no idea what emotional and mental state she was in.

She shook those thoughts off when the elevator stopped. If the shower hadn’t woken Alex, the sound of Clark running full speed into his now thankfully clad sister would have woken her.

Alex slid out of bed and over to the doorway, standing next to her mother and father while they watched the two alien members of the family on the ground holding each other. Clark had his head buried in Kara’s shoulder while she held him tightly. The stronger he had gotten the tighter he could be held.

Kara was shocked, not by the sudden hug but by the tears she could feel wetting her shoulder. Clark was a tough kid, determined that he would be Superman one day. As he often told her, Superman did not cry.

But at this moment he was crying very hard.

“You aren’t going to die, are you?” he asked, trying to gain control of his sobs. “Please tell me you aren’t going to die. You can’t die. I don’t want you to leave me. Please Kara.”

“Shhh.” she whispered in his ear. “Its okay. I’m not going to die, I promise. I won’t leave you Clark.”

“You won’t try to kill yourself anymore? You promise?”

Kara took a deep breath, tears leaving her eyes as well.

“I promise, I won’t.”

“You will stop drinking? I don’t like when you drink. Its making you sick, isn’t it? Thats why you lost weight and your eyes are red all the time. You don’t eat. You promise you will stop? I don’t want you to die.”

Kara tried to swallow but her mouth was dry. Instead she took a fresh breath and heeled onto him tighter.

“I’m going to stop, Clark. It won’t be easy but I will stop. I am so sorry. You know I love you, more than anything, right? You are my baby. You will always be.” she whispered. Clark nodded his head but kept his eyes shut and his arms tight.

“I’ve been scared.” he told her. “I don’t like being scared. Were you hurting? Was it bad when you got here? Do you hate everyone?”

Kara shook her head. “I don’t hate anyone. It was bad, but I got through it. We got through it. I think Alex is a little sore. I hit her head a few times while she was holding me but we are okay.”

Clark nodded his head and backed away a bit, keeping his arms on her but looking her over.

“You are too thin. You need to eat more.” he told her, sniffing a bit, trying to be the responsible man of the house now. “You know I will always love you, no matter what, right? You can never tell me anything that will make me love you less. You don’t have to keep secrets from me. I can help. I can take it.”

Jeremiah and Eliza dropped their heads, knowing what he was referring to, and wishing he hadn’t brought it up. Alex noted their reaction and began worrying. They had not told her of their conversation on the beach with Clark and Alex had not explained Kara’s involvement with the League of Assassins. There had been more important things to worry about.

“What do you mean, Clark?” Kara asked carefully.

“I just mean if you want to drink you can tell me and we can play or go fly or something instead. You don’t have to hide it from me. I don’t want you to drink anymore but I know you will want to. I did a lot of searching on Google… don’t get mad…”

“I’m not mad. I understand. I won’t keep it from you, okay? I’ll tell you.”

Jeremiah and Eliza nearly dropped to the floor in relief, causing Alex to give them a look that indicated they would be having a conversation the next time Kara slept under red lights.

Clark stood up and Kara allowed him to assist her in the same. Both their faces were red but at least both were smiling.

“I don’t want to leave you. I’m staying here.”

Kara shook her head, placed a hand on his shoulder and grinned.

“You have school, big guy. You aren’t going to miss any school because of me. Understand?”

“But I won’t! It’s only three more weeks and I told my teachers I had a grandmother who was dying and they all said they could email me my assignments and I could finish that way. I told them Mom and Dad were good with it and since Mom and Dad were with you, they had to take my word for it. Can you believe they bought it?”

Kara smiled, not surprised at all that Clark would pull something like this. She also had no doubt that a dose of those big blue eyes and Eliza would let him do as she wished. As cold and as sterile this place could be, the idea of having her whole family in one place was comforting. But what could happen weighed on her mind.

“Clark, I would love to have you here but I am going to be taking some medications starting this afternoon. They won’t hurt me but I am not sure what other effects they could have on me. Some of them may scare you. I might be sleepy all the time or sick or say weird things. I’m kind of scared and I don’t want you…”

“If you have your powers I can hold your hand and you can squeeze as tight as you want.” he reasoned, knowing it wasn’t true. Kara had a lot stronger grip than he did but it was a bargaining chip in his favor.

“Clark, it could be nothing or it could be scary. The doctors are going to try a bunch of different medications on me and I really don’t know what is going to happen.”

“I really don’t care. If I was here, would you leave me to go back to school? You left school to take me to the Fortress when my hearing and vision changed. You taught me to fly. You never left me. Please, Kara, don’t make me go back.”

The blonde took a deep breath and looked at her parents by the door. Eliza was smiling, despite the tears in her eyes. She gave a slight nod as did Jeremiah.

“Then I guess you are staying. Just promise me, no matter what I say, if I say something mean you won’t be mad and you won’t listen to me. If I tell you to leave or our parents or Alex tell you to leave, you need to walk outside and not listen. You promise?”

“Yeah, I promise. If you say something mean I’m going to say something mean back before I leave though. Deal?”

Kara nodded, figuring that was as much as an agreement as she would get. “Yeah, you got a deal.”

“Thanks. I love you. I’ll pick a room close to yours. I need to figure out how to get my X Box and my clothes and stuff up here. Your boyfriend couldn’t handle anymore weight. I think he needs to start exercising if he is going to keep doing this superhero stuff. If he says I hit him with a fence post he is lying. Okay he isn’t lying but he never said in the rules that I couldn’t. He ran all the way, here so you should probably go say hi to him. He wasn’t sure if you would want him to see you. He is still wearing that red costume too, probably trying to look cool for you.”

Kara patted the boy on his cheek and mussed up his shaggy hair.

“He is not my boyfriend, he is just my friend, okay?”

“Does he know that? Because he did just carry me on his back across the United States.” Clark fairly pointed out.

Kara didn’t answer him, instead going to the bathroom and checking herself in the mirror.

She looked like hell. Her skin was pale, her eyes were red even before she had been crying and it was obvious she hardly slept the past week or the past two nights since the worst of the withdrawals faded.

“He is not going to care how you look.” Alex told her, walking into the small bathroom. “He has a pretty good idea what you have been through. I doubt he expects you to look your best. He came anyway.”

Kara let her shoulders drop, knowing Alex was right. There was absolutely no way she would be presentable to anyone, which is one argument she had against seeing Barry now. But he had come anyway. Looking up, she smiled, seeing him pacing around in the cabin, mask back but still in that red suit. He looked as nervous as she felt. The blonde was not sure she was ready for Barry Allen to see the real her.

Then she realized he had already seen the real here, the last time she saw him. He had seen the monster behind the mask.

And he came anyway.

Kara put her hair in a ponytail, changed quickly out of her pajama pants into blue jeans and headed towards the elevator, surprised that no one followed her. The ride up seemed to take forever. She had not been up since coming back with Alex after deciding to stay. It would be nice to see the sun again.

When the door opened, she saw Barry pacing nervously, very quickly then stop cold, looking straight at her. He looked surprised as if he hadn’t expected her, then realized the elevator was very quiet and he wouldn’t hear everything going on below.

She stepped out slowly, not exactly sure what to say. The last time she had seen the man, Kara had told him everything. The alcohol in her system combined with Kelex’s statement turned her mouth into a waterfall that she could not stop from running. He now knew almost every dirty secret she had. Maybe not every single one but enough to know she was a wreck.

But he was here.

“Hi.” the blonde started with, not sure what else to say.

“Hi.”

Barry was surprised by what he saw. The man had not known what to expect but seeing Kara look so… vunerable… surprised him. He had not really taken the time to notice how thin she was, how pale she was. When he had first met her 6 years ago, her skin wasn’t exactly tanned but neither was it pale, just had a healthy glow. There was no glow now. Her deep blue eyes were bloodshot. Barry was happy to see her hands weren’t shaking but she was clenching her fists, quite hard considering the strain the tendons in her forearms was obvious.

Still her smile remained the same.

“So… thanks for bringing Clark. You didn’t have to. I’m glad you did but… uh… anyway, thanks.”

Barry shook his head. “It was no problem. I was hoping to just see you with my own eyes, to make sure you were okay. You look better. How are you feeling?”

“Like hell.” Kara answered him, surprising Barry with honesty. “Why? Why did you want to see me? Why do you care? I appreciate it but is there one thing I have done since you have known me, that should make you care about me? I don’t understand.”

Barry stepped closer to her, not close enough to be in her space but at least enough that her eyes couldn’t avoid him.

“You were the first one who believed me. Yeah, you didn’t tell me the whole truth and I understand that you couldn’t, but you could have simply told me I was crazy and walked away. You didn’t. You told me you believed me. No one else ever had before. You gave me hope, confidence that I wasn’t crazy. Do you have any idea how important that was for me to hear? Since my mother died, all I had in my life were people telling me I was confused, seeing things, lying to protect my father. I had almost given up before I met you. I had almost convinced myself that the whole search for the truth thing was pointless. You are the one who kept me believing. Besides, I kind of like you, even if you are a Star Wars nerd.”

Kara would usually laugh when he brought up one of the fundamental differences they had always had. Today, she didn’t have it in her.

“I’m sorry, Barry. I realize that maybe our meeting up again and seeing each other again, it hasn’t worked out the way you thought it would. My life, me, I’m a mess. I didn’t want you caught up in it before, I stayed away to protect you from me but when I saw you again, I couldn’t help myself. I… I’m going to be going through some stuff the next month or so. I don’t know what is going to happen. They are going to give me some experimental medicines. This isn’t the first time it has happened but I think these are going to actually effect me. How they will effect me is what has me so worried. I knew how I was living my life was not good on so many levels but it was mine. I knew what to expect, I knew how to cope, I knew how to live at least. Now I know nothing.”

Barry nodded his head, not saying anything, not moving when Kara walked to the window and closed her eyes as the sunbeams hit her face.

“It is taking everything in me not to fly out of here. I really need… something. Okay, I need a drink. If I didn’t have my powers and asked you to take me away from here, would you?”

Barry thought about it, surprised by the question. He had a feeling this was a test but had no idea what the right answer was.

Then he remembered Clark asking him not to be like Nightwing.

“A week ago, yeah, no doubt. But you aren’t being kept against your will now. If you decided to stay you know you have some things to take care of. If you gave up on that you would have to walk away yourself. I wouldn’t do it for you. I wouldn’t stop you but I won’t help you hurt yourself.”

Kara turned back from the window and met his eyes. He seemed genuine and she was not sure how she felt about that.

“Thats different.” she admitted. Kara could always make Dick Grayson do whatever she wanted. Since she was 18 the boy was a pawn in her hand, not that she ever admitted to herself that she treated him like one. It was true none the less. Kara had Dick Grayson wrapped around her finger and could make him do anything.

Perhaps Barry Allen was different.

The girl was not sure how she felt about that. Everything was changing. Control was everything to her as far as others went. Now everything was out of control.

“Yeah, I guess.” Barry agreed. “We are kind of use to helping people by doing something. Doing nothing is harder but sometimes I guess it has to happen. Want to take a walk? I’ve never been to Kentucky before, especially the forests. Not much of an outdoorsman, believe it or not.”

Kara agreed and the two walked side by side. She had not really taken the time to see the area herself. She thought the temptation to run would be too great so she had stayed underground since she returned with Alex. Now that she was able, the girl really took in the scenery.

Kara heard a song she had only heard on the internet before and reached back placing a hand on Barry’s lightning bolt covered chest.

“Shh! Listen.” she whispered. “She is close.”

Barry did listen hard, wondering what enemy could be coming that had Kara keeping him quiet and in stealth mode.

Hearing nothing, he finally got her attention and shrugged his shoulders.

Kara grinned and whispered once again. “I’ve never seen or heard one in person. Hear that bird singing? Its a Kentucky Warbler. They nest on the ground and stay low in the forest. Okay, I got her. She is in a tree about a hundred or so yards from us. There is no way we can sneak up on her. I would have to fly and don’t really need the temptation. I wish you could see her. She is beautiful. Yellow underbelly, black sideburns and yellow striping around the eyes. Kind of like glasses.”

Barry was impressed and surprised. Kara had what seemed like a natural smile on her face.

“You are a bird watcher?”

Kara nodded her head. “When I first landed they were the first species I saw. I thought they may rule the Earth considering their numbers. We had no birds on Krypton. By the time I was born they had all become extinct due to the planet dying. I had never seen any living creature as beautiful as them. I tried to communicate with them and of course you know how that worked out. I was always fascinated with them though. It was the only good thing about learning to fly, seeing them up close in the air. Ironically Alex hated bird watching but Eliza insisted she give it a try. Thats when she saw me and Clark going into the cave to hide and found us. I don’t consider myself a bird watcher. I just like to appreciate beauty wherever I can find it and birds are nearly everywhere. Wildlife is the true beauty of this world. If humans lived on a planet without it, perhaps they would appreciate what they have more.”

Barry was surprised. Kara had told him things about herself before, six years ago. He knew she was a fan of wildlife but not of cages. Knowing what he knew now, it made sense.

“Was there any wildlife at all on Krypton?”

Kara shook her head. “No, the planet was too inhospitable. I overheard rumors of monsters in some of the more barren areas but none were ever confirmed. We should go back. Do you want to talk to Caitlin before you have to go back?”

Barry thought about it.

“If she has the time but probably not. I would rather she be doing whatever she is doing. I guess you are going to start soon on these medications?”

“In a couple hours. I’m going to be given mood stabilizers first. Some of these drugs can make a person suicidal so I will be under red lights with Alex. Depending on how my body reacts Caitlin and the other doctor will make adjustments. The hard part is going to be finding a drug that can react with my cells, keeping the same effects whether I have my powers or not. That way I won’t have to take different dosages depending on if I want my powers or not. If it doesn’t work and I can’t just use a bracelet or lightbulb to negate the solar energy in me… then I guess I have a big decision to make.”

The caught the man’s attention. “You aren’t going to give up, are you? Because it could take some time…”

“I’ll avoid red sunlight until my body heals from the hell I have put it through. Then I might give up… I always planned to give up being Supergirl when I was 30, when Clark was old enough to have mastered his powers and at least defend himself against anything. Kelex developed a crystal that can be implanted in my body and negate my cells ability to metabolize solar energy. My powers would be gone for good as long as it was inside me. Thats what I have always wanted. So if I can’t switch them on and off, if its a choice between being Supergirl full time or being… me, I think I want to be me. To be like I used to be. I’m going to wait though. I will give them a chance, but if all else fails and I have to make a decision, I think I know what that decision is going to be.”

The two walked in silence, taking in the sun and the large areas of shade from the massive tress. After too short a time they had made it back into the cabin.

“Look, I realize this isn’t a great time to ask you on a date, but I was serious when I said I wanted to be here for you. You need a friend who doesn’t dress like a bat 90% of the time, right? Text me, call me, no matter what time of the day or night. If you are bored and want someone to watch movies with because I know you and Alex have very different tastes, I will be here.”

“I will.” Kara promised. “Just give me a few days. I’m not sure what is going to happen but if I start to drool or seeing things that aren’t there… again maybe we could check out this Firefly you talked about. Clark is staying and I am sure will need a video game partner. Thanks Barry, for everything.”

Kara leaned up and kissed the man’s cheek then with a smile, moved towards the elevator. Barry never moved until the door closed and she was gone.

Walking outside, he reluctantly pulled his mask on and prepared to leave.

Should he tell her about Lobo’s concern over some red ring? Should he have told her he met with Jessica the night before and began his own therapy sessions?

No, it wasn’t important. Right now she was safe, underground in a fortress. There would be no fights or red rings flying from the sky to help her and take her over. He would tell her later if she decided to take up the cape again but right now, Kara needed to focus on herself and nothing else. He really didn’t have enough information and she didn’t need any additional worries.

Taking a deep breath, the man took off for Central City, already counting the days until she called him.