Bella MacLeod's Twilight Fanfiction

Seeing Red

By BetterInTexas

Chapter 34: Not Ashamed

Kara sat up in bed, annoyed that she had to lay down but slightly mollified knowing Alex was confined to bed as well. Their parents were learning everything they could about Kara’s present physical state which was a nightmare and making sure that Alex suffered no ill effects or was exposed to any radiation that might have been present on an alien world. Neither girl was happy but at least they had each other as usual. Bruce refused to be tested and since he owned the place no one could really make him.

The line up of the Justice League was in the Block, except for John Stewart. Kara heard them all agree that a Green should be nowhere around. Kara was relieved, knowing if she sensed that energy she would not be able to hold back.

Guy Gardner had also arrived and was on sublevel six, having his ring examined by multiple bio physicists.

Kara’s doctor was not having much luck.

Veritas had placed a red sun crystal on Kara and to the blonde’s relief her powers still dimmed, but she knew that even without them, she was the most powerful person in this building.

Drawing her blood was met with no success. The needle had been unable to penetrate her red aura, being broken on touch. Once she had relaxed enough for the aura to drop and the needle to pierce her skin, the blood that was drawn ate the syringe in less than a second.

Now Lobo was working with Bruce to shape a nth metal needle and syringe that could hopefully hold her blood, or the acid that used to be her blood.

A cellular scan showed she was emitting more power than Gardner, almost three times as much. Her ring seemed to vibrate constantly, and it took a lot of will power not to let it transform her clothes into the fearsome outfit she had worn to fight Doomsday after receiving the ring. Gardner had spoken to Eliza as a go between with Kara about what to expect. Kara did not have anything against the man, but she had felt a strange need to assert dominance over him on Ysmault and warned him immediately to get away. According to Gardner when Kara wished it, her clothes would transform into what her subconscious wished them to be.

That could be bad if her Dad was around, considering some of the costumes she had designed but had either been too shy too or was forbidden by him to wear.

Kara noted that Alex was in a deep sleep, obviously exhausted over the past few days. It had been a trying time for all of them and was still trying. Kara did not want to be here. This place reminded her of her early days of recovery and she knew the medications in her system were gone. Making medicine for a Kryptonian had been hard enough. Making medicine for a Kryptonian with acid for blood would be impossible.

No matter what they tried or how confident her parents sounded, she wasn’t fooled. This ring was not coming off short of her death.

The blonde slipped off her bracelet and her hearing rushed her. It was a heady feeling, one she had forgotten without her powers for so long.

She wanted to be angry at herself but couldn’t be. Kara never had a choice and Atrocitus knew that. He played her perfectly, knew what would set her off. She still hadn’t had an opportunity to ask about that problem. He was not on Ysmault and she was not a mindless creature following him around the galaxy, so someone must have dealt with him. If they hadn’t, Kara would find and kill him. Now that she had a ring, he wouldn’t be able to hide from her, not like he had the other Lanterns. She was the most powerful, stronger than even him. She knew it. Kara had destroyed a creation of her father’s that should have been impossible to destroy. The girl wasn’t aware of all the details but knew that after she believed Alex was dead, she had been consumed with rage and unleashed all of it onto the monster turning him into nothing.

Apparently, she did not vomit acidic blood like the rest of the Reds but breathed fire. Leave it to Kara to be unique.

The girl slipped out of bed and moved next to Alex, taking her in, trying to forget the pain and terror she felt when she believed her sister dead. Alex had been by her side through everything, good and bad and the idea of losing her was too much to bare. Their parents had clung to both tonight as had Clark, but Kara never let her eyes leave Alex.

She truly though her sister had died in a ball of fire, flying the jet Kara had made with her own hands.

Running her fingers gently through Alex’s short hair, Kara decided that she needed to visit the bathroom. At least the rest of her body still functioned correctly.

After taking care of herself she stared in the mirror. The blonde knew she shouldn’t, but the ring needed some release. She closed her eyes and focused, trying to not let it take her over. She felt the vibration, heard the hum of power. Opening her eyes, as she suspected, she was no longer in her pajamas, instead decked out in a red body suit with a Red Lantern symbol planted where the House of El crest once resided. Her midnight black cape was lighter than her normal cape, dragging the floor slightly and her boots resembled the ones she wore with her Supergirl skirt, thigh high and black in color.

She would never hear the end of it from Cat Grant if she appeared in public dressed like this.

Kara was frightening. She frightened herself in this outfit. She could not pull off that sunny disposition she faked as Supergirl. This was her true self now, blood and darkness mixed together. Taking a deep breath, she did her best to relax, to grab the power and put it away as she had learned to do in the early days of learning to control her heat vision. After a minute, she was back in her pajamas.

Kara stepped back into the room where her and Alex’s hospital beds were. She listened around the lab, wondering if Barry was still up.

He was. Three doors down. Kara looked through the walls and saw him playing video games with Clark.

Kara walked quietly down the hall, not bothering to knock. Clark looked up and smiled at her.

“Guess you two want to talk, right? I should probably get some sleep. Love you, Kara.” he finished pulling her into a hug and walking out.

Kara looked at a grinning Barry.

“He’s worried.” the man told her, not that she hadn’t figured that out on her own.

Kara sat on the bed next to him. “We need to talk. I need to know what happened. Tell me the truth, where is Atrocitus?”

Barry took her hand, turning to meet her eyes.

“We killed him. I mean I killed him. We did… he made it obvious where he was. The battery and him were hiding out in the Great Pyramid on the Yucatan Peninsula. We picked up his energy signature. The bastard wasn’t trying to hide. We had no choice but to take him. We left J’onn behind with your family in Raleigh and left in the transport.”

Kara suspected as much. Atrocitus told her they were busy. “That must have been when he called me.”

“He called you?” Barry asked, surprised. Kara nodded.

“Its how I knew that Doomsday was attacking Metropolis. Lex may have been hiding him, but I have no doubt Atrocitus let him loose.”

Barry thought about this and agreed. He wasn’t sure if Lex was involved with Atrocitus or just an idiot who was played. It seemed he was played. They all were he supposed.

“I think once we were there, he planned to fly to Metropolis after taking his shot at us, either to kill us or distract us. He had two other Red Lanterns inside the pyramid guarding the battery. Bruce used Stewart as a distraction and went inside, planted a bomb inside the battery then killed the two Lanterns, cut off their heads and fingers. Diana, Curry and I attacked Atrocitus from the front. I stayed back, waiting for Diana to give the signal. Once Atrocitus attacked Diana, Curry threw her sword to me and I cut off his hand and head. Then I destroyed the ring.”

Kara felt sick to her stomach.

“You had to kill.” she whispered, feeling defeated. She never wanted that for Barry. He had never told her his part in blowing up a squadron of Dominators. It had never come up.

“I would do it again, without hesitation. He wanted to lead you away, make you a slave. That was never going to happen. He overestimated himself and underestimated us. I’m sorry. We should have stayed back. If we had, you would never have had to take…”

“Yes, I would.” Kara interrupted. “Its not your fault. It was always going to be me. No one else could have destroyed that monster and I couldn’t have done it without the ring. I was ready to die until I saw Alex… it doesn’t matter. Don’t beat yourself up about not being there. Because of you, all of you, I’m not following him around the Galaxy in some mindless state.”

“I still feel like we failed you.”

“You saved me.”

Barry touched Kara’s cheek and smiled, leaning in to kiss her.

Kara jumped back away from the bed quickly.

“Uh… did I do something wrong?” the man asked. He had missed her, worried for her, despaired for her. Now he finally had her back close to him and she obviously didn’t want to kiss him.

“I don’t know if its safe.” Kara admitted. “I don’t want to burn you. I… know it’s just supposed to be my blood but apparently, I can breathe fire now from my mouth. Until I know for sure what’s going on with me, I don’t want to risk you being injured.”

Barry stood and walked over to her.

“It’s a chance I am willing to take.” he told her confidently.

“I’m not willing to take it. There are probably going to be a lot of things we can’t do anymore. Barry, I have never felt less human. I have always felt alien of course, hard not to with these powers, but with the crystal inside me… now I don’t have that. I’m ruined.”

“Kara, you are not…”

“I can’t take meds anymore. I can’t sleep with all this power wanting to let loose. I don’t want to do anything other than fly away somewhere, hide and keep myself from ruining anymore lives. I want to go away, but I can’t. I feel trapped and no matter what my parents say, this ring isn’t coming off. This is what I am now. I’m dangerous to everyone around me.”

Barry shook his head. He wasn’t surprised. The man had suspected Kara would react this way. He and Alex had even talked about it in the days waiting for Kara and Diana to rise. The Flash thought of kissing her anyway but didn’t want to make her angry. Kara had reminded him more than once, she did not like being manhandled or touched unless she wanted to be. So instead of kissing her, he simply brought her in for a hug. She held onto him tightly, very tightly, but he didn’t complain. If she broke his back, he could heal later.

“Hey, on the bright side we have matching red rings now.” he tried joking, hoping to make her smile but earning a sharp look from her as she backed away.

“My necklace is still at home at least. I had taken it off for a shower and left it in the bathroom. I’m glad. It would have been destroyed against Doomsday. I still can’t believe he tore the material and crushed the armor. No offense, Barry, but I am glad you weren’t there.”

It was the Flash’s turn to show irritation. The man walked away a bit, trying to school his face and not show that the comment hurt him.

“You will never have faith in me, will you?” he decided to ask. The question obviously surprised Kara and the confusion was clear on her face.

“Faith? That thing was an unstoppable killing machine. What does faith have to do with it? I didn’t want Alex or J’onn there. I didn’t want anyone there. My father created that thing. It was my problem. Lex may have hidden it and Atrocitus may have set it free, but it was my blood that gave life to it. J’onn and Alex almost died. Lobo did die, for a while. What does me wanting to keep you safe from the ultimate predator have to do with faith in you? Of course I have faith in you but that thing… I didn’t want anyone I love near it. Look what almost happened to Alex. It would have killed me Barry. I was dying, close to death. I could feel myself bleeding out internally and I know when I finally do try to sleep, he will be waiting for me. You couldn’t have done anything.”

“Maybe we could have together though.” he pointed out. “Maybe you wouldn’t have had to take such a beating if we were together. I should have been there, and we could have taken him out, together. I have been working hard to get better, Kara. I can do things I never dreamed of. I could have phased him into the ground, cut off his head. He was fast, but he couldn’t have been as fast as me. You aren’t.”

Kara took a deep breath. She wanted to scream at him, tell him to shut up and listen to her. She wanted to tell him he wasn’t as powerful as he thought he was and working with a few superheroes wasn’t going to make him strong enough to fight Doomsday. Kara wanted to remind him that she had been doing this much longer and while she loved his positivity sometimes it annoyed the hell out of her.

Instead she dipped her head and nodded, controlling herself, barely, not wanting to hurt his feelings.

“You’re right Barry. We probably could have done it together, but it wasn’t meant to be. I’m going to go to bed and close my eyes, pretend to sleep to make Mom happy. I have a lot to do in the morning, like getting out of here as soon as Alex is cleared.”

Barry approached her and gently kissed her cheek.

“I love you, Kara.” the man told her.

Where has that gotten you? was Kara’s first thought but didn’t say it.

“I love you too.”

Kara moved towards her room and checked to make sure Alex was still sleeping. She listened and heard her parents talking to Shay, going over Alex’s cat scans and radiation readings, hoping the syringes Bruce and Lobo were developing could hold Kara’s blood and comparing the scans of her ring to Gardner’s. Gardner himself was asleep on level 6. She would have to ask him how he managed that. She never realized how reliant she was on her sedative until she didn’t have it anymore.

Then she moved to the fourth level, one floor up and visited J’onn. The Martian was still awake, no doubt a million things on his mind. J’onn told Kara over and over since she landed that the bad things that happened were not on her. Despite this, she knew he felt a lot of guilt over things he could not change as well.

“Shouldn’t you be asleep?” Kara asked, checking him over, happy to see the burning hole that had been in his chest was nearly gone, just scar tissue on top that should heal with time as if it were never there.

“I could ask you the same thing.” he told her.

Kara shook her head and pulled a chair next to his bed.

“I can’t sleep. I have too much… energy I guess, running through my veins. I feel like I am on fire from the inside but its a good kind of fire. It doesn’t hurt, it just needs to be released. So relaxation is the best I can do. As soon as they can figure out someway to get my blood drawn, we are all leaving. I still haven’t moved my furniture and stuff into my new house.”

J’onn stilled, watching Kara’s face closely. She was smiling but he also knew she was extremely tense right now. He had spent years watching her face and knew her well.

“You think that’s a good idea? Leaving the facility before they can determine a way to get this ring off?”

Kara grinned at him and took his hand gently.

“We both know that they won’t find a way no matter how long they search. If there are any answers, they are going to be in the Fortress. This isn’t just alien technology, J’onn. I was created using technology and blood magic. Science won’t help. I doubt anything can. I am ready to go home. Alex is clear from what I just heard and… why did you get in front of that blast, J’onn? You had seen what they did to me. You had to know what would happen. If I hadn’t frozen you, we wouldn’t be here talking.”

J’onn expected this conversation to happen. He had hoped to be out of this place and avoid her for a while until she lost interest in having it.

“You’re right, I saw. I saw you take two blasts within seconds. I saw your armor crack, your suit torn and you bloody and beaten. One more blast and he would have ended you. I had to buy you time to try and recover and that is what I did. I have told you since I met you, Kara. You three kids will always be first to me. You don’t get to decide what I think is worth living and dying for. It’s my decision and I made it a long time ago. I pray nothing like that happens again but if it does, I will be right there, even if it means I die. You will never change that about me, so don’t even try.”

Kara shook her head in irritation. “I should have hit you harder in the hangar when I was 13.”

J’onn nodded in agreement. “I should have hit you back. Maybe it would have knocked the cocky out of you.”

“I’m not cocky.” the blonde assured him. “I knew there was no way I could beat that creature. Not on my own.”

“Then why didn’t you wait for back up?” he countered.

“Because people were dying. I couldn’t beat it, but I could buy them time. That creature was one of Zor El’s projects. Krypton destroyed enough, and more lives were being lost. I couldn’t stay back. I didn’t have a choice. I wasn’t going to take the ring, I was ready to die but then Alex… Jack always said I needed to keep my emotions out of a fight. They made me sloppy. He was right, but when it comes to her I can’t do that J’onn. I thought she was dead. I lost it. The sad thing is I would do it again if I saw her… I know I would. Get some rest. I have things that need to be done. Come to the Fortress when they release you. I want Kelex to perform some tests, for my own peace of mind, okay?”

“I’ll be there, I promise. Make sure you are too.”

While Kara was checking with J’onn, Barry made a long overdue call.

“Barry?” Joe answered. The Flash was not surprised he was at S.T.A.R. “Did you lose your suit? Why haven’t you answered your com?”

“Sorry, things have been kind of crazy. I figured the Danvers, or somebody told Dante what was going on and you knew where I was.”

“Yeah, on another planet! Did you even know if you could breathe there? You hopped on to some ship with that monster…”

“That monster saved lives in Metropolis, Joe. Lay off him. I won’t say it again. How is everyone?”

Joe, let out a breath, realizing like he did when he was worried he started blaming everyone and everything.

“Things are… its a mess here. The team, Cisco, Wally, Caitlin, Dante, they tried everything they could to get to Metropolis, but it was too late. It was over by the time they even got close. Cisco is beating himself up, Dante has kept to himself, not talking to anyone. Caitlin can barely get him to speak. Wally… he keeps second guessing himself, running times in his head and thinking if he hadn’t waited on Cisco’s breaches he might have made it straight there. He got lost a few times and has been pouring over maps and satellites trying to learn different routes across the country. Caitlin was certain Kara died hating her. We have been wondering if you would ever come back to Earth. It’s… good to hear from you son. Singh was told by your FBI buddies that you would be working the Metropolis scene, so things are covered at work. We could all use you here, Barry, even if its jut for a few minutes.”

Barry was not surprised. He knew his friends would be worried. He didn’t know they tried to reach Metropolis and the thought was touching, even though ironically, like Kara had felt about him, he thought all they could have done is die.

“Let me get Kara out of here and back home. Once we get to Midvale I will call you and be at S.T.A.R a few minutes later. Probably tomorrow morning.”

Joe told him to be careful and ended the call.

He zipped around, frustrated that he had to wait on elevators, and considering running up the shaft phasing through the top and doors.

He finally found her talking to her parents. Her father was holding her while she cried, Eliza running a hand through her hair. He saw Jeremiah agree to something and suspected they would all be going back to Midvale when the sun rose. It was Kara’s retreat when things went wrong, or she needed to feel safe. She would always go back to Midvale.

The next morning, after Kara pretended to sleep for a few hours and practically fed breakfast to Alex, the Danvers took a helicopter to Raleigh and then drove the car they had left there nearly a week ago, home. Barry followed on foot, not wanting to crowd the vehicle that already had five passengers. Kara held and ice pack to Alex’s head which the girl pushed off repeatedly.

All in all, Kara seemed fine this morning, but he was not fooled. She was focusing on Alex, so she wouldn’t have to focus on herself.

Barry was unable to talk to her straight away when they arrived at the Midvale home.

Inside, there were the boxes Kara had been packing, preparing for her move into the new house. They sat there as if mocking her.

Then there was Leslie, waiting on the back porch.

The woman pointed to Kara and beckoned her inside where they went right upstairs to her and Alex’s room, so Barry decided this might be a good time to return to S.T.A.R. until she was done. Explaining this to the Danvers, the man went into their basement, hardly even noticed the Fortress which usually left him with a sense of awe and walked back into his apartment.

While Barry checked on his team, Kara was back in her old room, two chairs pulled out, that she recognized as the ones her and Jessica used in the past for their sessions.

Before sitting down, to her great surprise, Leslie hugged the girl.

“You’re an idiot.” she whispered in Kara’s ear, then broke away and sat, Kara doing the same.

“The drugs won’t work anymore, I am guessing. Shay called and told me but seems confident that she can figure out a way. I know she was lying and so do you. Everything I have heard about this thing tells me you die if it comes off.”

Kara nodded in agreement. “That’s what I understand.”

“How many times have you tried to pull it off already?” the woman asked knowingly.

The blonde shrugged her shoulders and looked towards the floor.

“A couple. Won’t budge. I considered breaking my finger but that would only make it even harder. It refuses to come off. I don’t understand it, but I am stuck with it.”

Leslie shook her head. “So instead of trusting others to help you, your answer was to commit suicide?”

“I remember parts of it.” Kara told her. “I don’t remember the fight, with Doomsday or Diana, but I remember parts where I was in the Blood Lake. It was… horrifying. I saw my true self, Leslie. Nothing is ever going to change that. I am more dangerous than ever now. As soon as word gets out, if it hasn’t already, that I am a Red Lantern, there will be a mass exodus of aliens from Earth, not just the bad guys either. I feel like I want to explode. I have been so used to feeling somewhat calm and rested and even human, I let myself forget what I really was. I am fate’s bitch and I am sick of it.”

Leslie shook her head, frustrated beyond belief. Therapy with Kara was never an easy experience but now she had something which would cause her to become angry and lose patience even quicker.

“I told you those medications would help but they weren’t the answer, you were. Nothing has changed so quit trying to kill yourself by taking off that ring. Your sister went to another planet to bring you back home and now you want to take yourself from her? Have you learned nothing?”

Kara slowly shook her head.

“I guess I haven’t.”

“Yes, you have. Keep going to meetings and keep your routine the same, even exercising and meals. Figure out a way to let yourself sleep. If you can’t, lay there for eight hours with your eyes closed. You are not being Supergirl again. You couldn’t handle it then and you sure as hell can’t handle it now.”

Kara shrugged her shoulders, the look on her face, showing defeat.

“I wasn’t planning on it. Why the hell would I keep going to meetings? I can’t get drunk. Why exercise with my powers back? Its a waste of time.”

Leslie had expected this.

“You may not be able to get drunk, but you are still going to want to. You are going to be an alcoholic and an addict the rest of your life. Everyday will be a struggle. That urge is never going to go away, and meetings are going to help you deal with those urges. As far as exercise find something like yoga or one of those other fads that teaches you to find your inner chi or whatever its called this month. You headed a bunch of mystical assassins. Surely, they knew some way to calm themselves. Figure it out and keep to your routines.”

“I don’t want to.” Kara argued. “I’m going to move into my new house and figure out a way to get my boyfriend to move on. It’s over.”

Leslie stood up and approached her.

“Its not over until I say its over and I won’t be saying that any time soon. You aren’t going to curl up in some ball and wait to die. You can still age with your bracelet or a necklace on. You can still be normal, taking that red mood ring out of the equation. That means you can still exercise. I read the reports Shay gathered from Gardner. They aren’t superhuman, they just have a lot of power. You can’t hurt yourself anymore, you can’t get drunk or high, so you are going to be looking for the next fix. The fix is on your hand and its going to become addicting. You have a bigger fight than you have ever been in. If you give up and try to kill yourself, you are nothing but a coward, and the Danvers have wasted a lot of years on you. Don’t do that to them. Keep a bracelet on, keep eating, find a way to sleep without drugs, keep exercising and keep your cool. I’ll be back in two days and I expect to see progress. You aren’t over, not by a long shot. We just don’t have any crutches to fall back on. Don’t screw with me, Kara, or I may find one of those rings myself and we can see who is the bigger superpowered bitch.”

Leslie walked out, leaving Kara alone. She heard her family turn the television on downstairs. Her mother and father had been so relieved that her and Alex were alive and safe, they hadn’t talked to her yet about what she was sure they wanted to. They hadn’t asked her about her stunt in the Fortress, nearly killing herself to force Kelex to remove the crystal. They had not talked about what she had seen or experienced. They had only told her that it would be okay somehow. They believed it too. Her mom and dad were big believers in hope. Any hope Kara may have built up since leaving the Block was gone now.

Joining them downstairs, the blonde figured it was time to catch up on the world.

To her great surprise, Jack Webb was on the television giving a press conference.

“Good afternoon. Today we have new information on the attack and have discovered links to Maxwell Lord and his plot to murder aliens using biological weapons against Supergirl and perhaps any metahumans and other aliens he deemed a threat. The National City Laboratory owned by Maxwell Lord was raided last night by the FBI. It was discovered that Max Lord had been conducting experiments on teenage human females, to turn them into superhuman weapons for his use. These girls had been comatose and four were dead before we arrived. One was alive and taken to a hospital where she is undergoing treatment. We are also investigating and plan to arrest the doctors who provided the girls to Lord Industries, as well as the board of directors and scientists who were directly involved in the experiments. Mr. Lord was not present at the scene and is currently missing. We have several warrants for his arrest and we believe he has fled the country. We will be working with Interpol to find him.”

Kara felt sick to her stomach. How did she miss this? Lord, Luthor, they had all figured out ways to get around her spying. Who else had? Five girls lives ruined, because of her.

“Something tells me Max Lord isn’t missing. Connolly knows where he dumped the body. No way they let him live. I bet he died in pain.” Alex whispered, satisfied.

“We also have verification that Lillian Luthor had knowledge and provided support for Lex Luthor’s illegal experiments and conspiracy to commit murder. She is also missing as of last night and we believe she is hiding stateside, but the possibility of her leaving the States is there. If anyone sees her, please call the number that should be on your screen now.”

“Do you think they killed Lillian?” Kara asked, feeling her acidic blood boiling.

“I doubt it.” Jeremiah said. “They didn’t put Lord’s picture up because they know he is dead. If she were dead, they wouldn’t bother having the populace looking for her.”

“I can find her.” Kara whispered.

Alex placed a hand on her knee. “No, you can’t. That is their thing and we have our own problems. Nothing has changed, Kara. You said you would quit and you are done. We both are. Doomsday was an extreme situation, but it is still over.”

“I’m a monster, Alex! How can you say nothing has changed?! Everything has changed!”

“Do not yell at me, again. Do you understand?” the older sister told her. Kara met Alex’s eyes and as usual, she forced herself to calm down. Not even the ring could change that.

Jeremiah watched them closely and changed the channel, deciding the news was doing Kara no good. He had no doubt Lord was dead and Lillian was in hiding, never to be free to roam in public again.

Unfortunately, all the stations, even after a week were talking about the attack.

“Leave it on, please?” Kara asked quietly.

He stopped on a talk show, one he had watched often. This was on one of the stations owned by Catco, so he hoped it wouldn’t anger Kara too much.

So of course the topic was Supergirl. The interviewer and the guest were in a heated debate.

“She saved Metropolis, who knows how many lives. How can you believe she is bad for the planet?”

“I am not denying she has done good over the years, but the public has come to rely on her and she disappears. It happened two years ago and happened again before this incident. Now we have a group of metahumans and aliens that no one truly knows taking on missions with no sanctioning, trying to fill the hole she left. How can the public trust her if she picks and chooses what she deems important enough to make an appearance at?” the man asked. Kara thought he may have been the mayor of Keystone city but wasn’t sure. He didn’t seem like anyone important. At least the Catco host appeared to be defending her.

“She may be dead now. Do you believe she owes you an explanation for where she has been, Mayor? Do you believe she owes the President or the people? She saved citizens lives at great risk to her own, possibly gave her life, and she should answer to anyone who wishes to know where she has been and what she has been doing? Are the tax payers providing her with a salary?”

“I am simply saying that if she is going to make the public rely on her, she can’t simply disappear whenever she feels that humanity isn’t worth her time. That creature was set loose by a mad man who was determined to kill her. Would he have set it loose if she were not here, or perhaps made a statement that she was leaving the planet? She was the target, the reason…”

“Lex Luthor was the reason!” the host insisted. “You are the Mayor of Keystone. If someone attempts to assassinate you and innocents are hurt instead, is that your fault?”

The man turned red, showing an anger that Kara found cute compared to hers. Listening to this short, pudgy politician was making her angry and the glow of her ring had nothing on his red puffy cheeks.

“This is typical of the media’s behavior. She is beyond reproach and always has been. If she is going to stay gone, she needs to tell the public and perhaps she won’t be a target and more lives will not be lost. Supergirl never had to report to anyone, despite her great power and ability to enter any country she wished illegally whether they were part of the UN or not. Any human doing this would be arrested. Now this Justice League appears to be granted the same immunity by the world. This has to stop.”

Jeremiah changed the station, having heard enough. The room was also glowing with a red tint.

The next channel had a special on the history of the Luthors and Supergirl, rehashing Lionel Luthor’s support for the girl and Lex and Lillian Luthor’s criticism once Lionel had died. For the first time questions were being raised about Lionel’s death.

Then the question of where had Supergirl been all these months came up again.

She was unreliable, she had been ignoring natural disasters that people she could have saved, died in. Questions were asked about whether she had tired of humanity and if she was alive, would she ever return.

Jeremiah decided to turn the TV off. Netflix was a much better idea.

“What have we always told you, Kara?” Eliza asked.

“That I owe humanity nothing.” Kara recited. Her mother had preached that to her since Kara arrived on Earth and determined she was the one who had to stop Non and Astra.

“It’s still true.”

Kara shrugged her shoulders, Alex taking her right hand and the ring dimming.

“But this is my legacy? Everything I have done, and all people will talk about is me abandoning Earth. I showed up to fight that monster and people complain that I am not around any longer, that I decided humanity wasn’t worth my time? What the hell have they ever done?”

“It will blow over.” Alex assured her.

“No it won’t.” the blonde disagreed. “People will think I am either dead or have just given up on them. Everything I have done will be overshadowed by the mystery of my disappearance. Nothing Bruce’s team does will make them forget about me. If I hadn’t shown up to fight Doomsday and they had… if they had been killed, I would be known as the girl who left humanity to die.”

“Kara,” Jeremiah told her. “You are not going back to it. You swore you wouldn’t. You swore to all of us.”

“Please don’t, Kara.” Clark whispered. “You promised.”

“I’m not, but I am going to set the record straight. If this planet wants to remember me, they will remember me for the truth and nothing else. I am tired of being afraid, tired of it all. I need to go to the Fortress. I need another costume like my old one but this one will cover my hands. One last time in the costume, no fights, no visits to the sick. Don’t stop me. I will end this, once and for all.”

Kara stood up and walked towards the basement, her family right behind her.

Eliza caught her first while Kara waited a few seconds for the transporter to open.

“I am good. Alex, please call Iris and tell her to go to National City tonight and be at Catco in the morning, 9 AM. She will have a pass there.”

“A pass to what? What are you going to do, Kara?”

The blonde smiled.

“What I always do. I am going to make history.”

Barry was with Iris when Alex made the call to her. Both he and Iris were confused but Iris hurried off to the airport for her trip to Catco. Barry found the Danvers in the Fortress, but all they knew was Kara would be holding a press conference in the morning. She was vague on the details, but they suspected she would announce her retirement. Since there were no transports to National City any longer, and Alex’s jet wreckage had already been salvaged and collected by Wayne Industries to secure the Omegahedron, they really had no way short of commercial airlines to get to National City before Kara would set in motion whatever she planned.

Calls to her went to voice mail.

So the Danvers planned to pretend like they weren’t nervous and worked on a project Kelex believed might have some success in providing Kara with much needed rest and perhaps other benefits. Barry himself, went back to Central City and ran to the coast, not exactly knowing where Kara was since she was not answering his calls either.

Cat Grant knew where she was.

The girl was on her balcony, in full suit, only her hands covered in blue as well as her arms. Cat had contacted her a few times since Kara had been released from rehab but not spoken to her at length, not wanting to bother her in her time of recovery. She had received a text message this morning asking her to organize a press conference inside Catco where she would be making a statement and gave her a list of reporters she wanted there.

Cat walked cautiously onto the balcony. It was eight AM and the conference was scheduled for 9, giving reporters who didn’t know across the country, no time to make it to National City.

“I was hoping to never see you in this suit again.” Cat greeted her, walking slowly onto the balcony.

“You won’t after today.” Kara assured her. “This won’t last long. I’m going to read a statement and then leave. There will be a million questions, a media firestorm. You should have fun with it.” Kara offered.

A few years ago, Cat would have been extremely excited about this. Now she was cautious. No she decided, she was scared.

“Your parents tell me you aren’t answering any calls. Tell me what you plan to do. I need to know or there won’t be any press conference.”

Kara figured as much. Cat did love to control information, as much as she claimed not to.

“The people of Earth want to know where I have been. They think I have abandoned them, they want to know why I only showed up to fight that monster. I’m going to tell the world the truth. I’m not going to hide what I am. They want to know, maybe they hate me, maybe they don’t. Either way, I am done lying and being talked about. I am done being accused of leaving humans to fend for themselves like they have done for a billion years. I am tired of it all. For better or worse, they are going to know the truth about the real me.”

Cat had a sinking feeling in her stomach. This was normally something that she would have never allowed, preached to Kara that it wasn’t possible, that it would destroy everything she had worked for.

But there was no changing her mind. Near death experiences tended to change a person she supposed. If she didn’t control this, Kara would find some other place to do it.

“You go live in an hour.” Cat simply said and walked back into her office, leaving Kara alone on the balcony, to think, to try and relax, to possibly change her mind.

It didn’t happen. At 8:55 a grim-faced Kara walked slowly into a room filled with Catco reporters and one lone reporter from the Central City Picture News.

She stood in front of the podium, waiting for the camera to set up, the lights to come on and an indication that she was live, about to stand before millions in the US and abroad.

Once the signal was given, she took a deep breath and began.

“Thank you all for coming. I have a statement to make, in answer to many questions about my whereabouts the last few months. I won’t be taking questions, but I will do my best to answer some questions the media has had recently since the events of last week.”

Looking around, she made sure she had all their attention. It wasn’t hard. Twenty or so reporters were in the room and everyone had a recording device pointed towards her, despite being filmed.

“Many people know my story. I arrived on this planet when I was 13 and taken in by people who loved me very much. I also had many problems. I remembered the death of my planet, I heard the explosion, the pieces of my home, striking the ship I was sent off in. When I arrived here, I suffered from Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome and severe anxiety, to the point that I could not hear thunder without having a panic attack. I also developed a major depressive disorder. Thanks to my loved ones who took care of me, I was able to battle these symptoms as best I could. Medication was not available due to my alien blood, but we all did the best we could. Without them, I would have been lost.”

Kara took a moment, taking a deep breath and tried to ignore the absolute stillness in the room. She did glance at Lois in the front who had a tear rolling down her cheek. Kara had never seen Lois Lane cry.

“At the age of 18, I decided I wanted to help people, use these gifts to help humanity and protect them, fight the battles they could not fight themselves, save the ones that couldn’t be saved without a miracle. I desperately wanted to be that miracle. But being a savior has consequences, a very high cost. Any solider, police officer, doctor, nurse and fireman can tell you this. Without medication, I turned to different types of alien alcohol and other substances. Two years ago, when I disappeared for three months it was because I tried to commit suicide. I was saved by others but took months to recover.”

A gasp from the back of the room caught her attention. She wasn’t sure which reporter had done it but was not surprised. She expected this reaction. For better or worse, after this, the world would either vilify her or understand and leave her alone. Either way, the world would never ask again, where she was or why she left.

“Six months ago, my symptoms had gotten worse. I was becoming ill, and after being approached by others who knew me well, I was taken to a special rehabilitation facility where I have been recovering and getting help. It was decided between myself and my counselors that I should stop being Supergirl, that the pressure and the things I saw were harming me worse. Since that time, I have stayed out of the spotlight, concentrating on getting better.”

Kara began wishing she had brought notes. She hadn’t gotten as far as explaining Doomsday, so she would have to wing it like everything else.

“I was watching the television when I found out about the attack on Metropolis. I knew the Justice League was in a battle elsewhere and knew from seeing the creature that I was the only one who could stop it. I along with other aliens, engaged the creature as soon as I could get there. With their help, I was able to defeat the creature but sustained life-threatening injuries and have been healing for the past week. I arrived because it was an extreme situation, one that not only threatened Metropolis but possibly the entire United States and world.”

The blonde looked out at the still quiet room and met Iris’s eyes. She was smiling and nodded her head. Kara may not have been able to read the other reporters thoughts, but Iris obviously thought she was doing the right thing. Maybe they were both right or wrong but it was too late to back out now.

“I wish I could be the perfect hero. Children, adults, many people from all walks of life have looked to me as a symbol of all that was right in this world. I wish that were true, but it isn’t. I have mental health issues and am an alcoholic and addict. I used to be ashamed of this, but I have met people and learned of people who have these same diseases. Some with these people with the same problems may be in this room, and thousands are most likely watching. I have been ashamed of this my entire life on Earth, but I am no longer ashamed. The shame is in not getting help. I am not human, but I am also not a god. I am a person who did the best she could to help others. Unfortunately, I am not able to help others anymore without hurting myself and the ones who love me deeply. Therefore Supergirl will be no more. This world will always have heroes, fire fighters, soldiers, police officers, paramedics, metahumans and aliens. It will not be defenseless. I realize admitting this could cause me to be criticized by some people even more so than in the past, but as I said, I am not ashamed. It has been an honor, a great gift, serving the people of this world. Thank you for your time.”

Kara walked out, leaving behind a room so quiet you could hear a pin drop. She opened a window on the floor and flew out, heading to the Fortress of Solitude. She did not fly fast, wanting time to think, to wonder what her family and the world’s reaction would be. Kara did not care about the world so much. No matter what they thought, Supergirl was dead. Her family’s thoughts were a different matter.

She had not taken their calls or Barry’s because she did not want to be talked out of this. Now it was out there, and she could move past it. If anyone tried to track her or the ones she called her loved ones, Kelex would prevent them from doing so. Those that knew would have their memories wiped if they didn’t already have a mental block in place.

It was over. She may be a monster, a Red Lantern, but she would be one in peace.

In the Arizona desert, underground in a bunker known only to a few, General Samuel Lane, his daughter Lucy and Lillian Luthor watched the broadcast.

Lane could not believe his luck.

“All this work to destroy her, all this work to discredit her, and she did it to herself. Amazing.” he said almost giddily. Lucy looked at her father in slight disgust that he would be so happy about what they had just learned.

Lillian Luthor looked at him sharply, wiping the smile off his face.

“You idiot. This is the worst possible thing that could have happened to us.”

“She admitted to the world that she was a mentally unstable junkie! How can this be bad?” the man asked.

Lillian shook her head, mourning her son but now focused on anger.

“Because, you idiot, she just became human.”