Bella MacLeod's Twilight Fanfiction

Survivors

By BetterInTexas

Chapter 29: New surroundings

The black motorcycle and its two female occupants, in black riding suits and helmets, pulled into the grocery store parking lot. Kara and Alex were taking a road trip, one Jeremiah had grudgingly allowed. While the two parents and the youngest child would fly to National City in four days, Kara and Alex would take a road trip across country, for one, to allow the girls one last summer adventure and two, to get Kara’s beloved motorcycle to National City. Apartments would be searched for, a lease signed and bags unpacked, Once they were set, Jeremiah, Eliza and Clark would leave their girls alone, on the other side of the country.

Stepping off the bike where she had been perched behind Kara, a large backpack strapped over her shoulders, Alex removed her helmet.

“Why are we here? I am not carrying anything else in this bag, much less, more groceries. You are going to have to deal with energy bars. Why do I have to carry the bag? Why can’t I drive? My ass is so sore… maybe I should drive for a while. The front seat doesn’t rub as much as this booster…”

“Alex! Calm yourself.” Kara told her, taking her own helmet off. “I love when I get a chance to say that to you for a change. Check the GPS and you can drive to our next spot. I will carry the bag. The first camp spot I picked out should be two hours from here. I’ll be right back.”

Kara slipped her glasses on and tied her hair in a pony tail. Alex was not sure why the hell they were here and hadn’t noticed the course deviation until they had just stopped.

“I’m coming with you.”

“Stay here Alex. I doubt this store would be crazy about shoppers with large backpacks on. Trust me on that. I will be back in a minute.”

“Don’t you need money? All our wordily finances and Dad’s credit card are in my purse in this pack.”

“I have my own money.”

“You only made a $150 painting a mural at the elementary.” Alex pointed out, wanting to remind Kara that her two week summer job hadn’t actually netted her a fortune. “Shouldn’t you hold on to it or something? Like if you are ever stranded and need food?”

Kara shrugged her shoulders. “Like you said, we have Daddy’s money, right? At least until I can get a job.”

“You can’t work a job. Not unless Mom and Dad approve it. You agreed to that, Kara.” the older sister reminded her.

The issue of employment had been discussed over the summer with the blonde. Kara wanted to work, to make her own way and Eliza and Jeremiah argued against it, citing her anxiety issues. The blonde made many points in her favor, including the fact that she would have to work one day and the parents told her that if she would not continue with therapy, she needed to start small, not working the drive thru window during the lunch rush. So as part of an agreement to prevent Jeremiah selling the house and moving to National City, Kara agreed not to work unless they all discussed the job and agreed or Kara began going to therapy again. If she did anything he thought would cause her to fall back on the progress she had made, he and Eliza would be moving to National City and Kara would live with them.

The teen had never once thought of telling them she was 18 and could do as she liked. The idea of saying something like that to Jeremiah and Eliza, even the thought horrified her. Kara needed parents in her life and would do whatever they told her, no matter how old she was. The only thing she would not do is stop her plans to go after Non and Astra and they understood this. A big part of Kara loved that Jeremiah was so protective of her. If Rozz had never crashed on Earth, Kara would have never dreamed of leaving home to go to college, much less another coast. Leaving home pained her. She tried to hide the sadness but of course fooled no one but Clark.

“I’m fine, Alex. I have plenty of job ideas that they will approve of. We can talk about this later. I will be right back then we head to the first camp site.”

Kara entered the store and took a look around. It had undergone a remodel in the past five years since she had been here but the smell was the same, the same smell as all supermarkets, thousands of foods, drinks, and packagings mixed in one covered space.

She walked to the baby aisle and a chill swept through her. Kara remembered this. She remembered the guard, running, the loud speakers, yelling, being chased. She remembered jumping on top of the counters and hopping the aisles from above. She remembered the sheer terror she felt, wondering if another sonic weapon would be used against her.

The teen shook her head and got down to business, deciding to find the store manager. Using her X ray vision she finally found a woman in the back, talking into a radio and from the conversation, she seemed to be the one in charge.

“Hello?”

“Yes, how can I help you?”

Kara opened her mouth, but wasn’t actually sure how to start.

“Uh… okay see… this is going to sound weird but…”

“Whatever it is, I am sure I can help.”

The woman looked kind, helpful and patient, even smiling a bit. She was not much different than Eliza in age and size and Kara suspected she probably had kids and the patience one develops along the way with them.

“Okay, my… a… my cousin, she was here… a long time ago. She stole some things. She was young and stupid and I just found out… anyway she didn’t want… she has been trying to turn things around so she asked me if I would come…”

The woman’s face went from friendliness to confusion then to shock.

“You are her, aren’t you?”

Kara dropped her head, kicking herself inside. She knew this would be a bad idea but she wanted to try.

“I don’t know who…”

“I know. Its okay. Are you okay?”

The blonde shook her head, making sure her hearing was working correctly.

“Am I okay?”

The manager looked around and saw no one around close enough to hear.

“I was an assistant manager at the time. I wasn’t here but I saw the video. You and the baby… you looked so scared. The security guard that chased you, she felt horrible. Everybody was so surprised, you looked like this homeless child and I guess she worried that you and the baby were runaways… then the stuff you did, the jumps and the speed… then there were these people taking the video or trying to. One guy was so angry that our video was erased. He actually threatened to have the store manager arrested on charges of treason. It was a nightmare. But we all wondered what happened to you and the baby. Is… the baby alright?”

Kara wiped a tear from her eye, being careful not to remove her glasses.

“Yeah, he is great. He really is. The reason I am here… I wanted to pay back what I took. I didn’t want to take it then but I had no choice. I have $150.”

“You don’t owe us anything.” the manager countered, still in a bit of shock that the girl who was an urban legend in the small town was standing in front of her.

“Yes I do. I don’t like the idea… it has always bothered me. At the time I was scared and my cousin was hungry… I have a family now, a really good family but for reasons I can’t explain, I need to do this. Please take this, put it into the store or something. Please?”

The manager looked at the girl, saw the sincerity and almost desperation in her face.

“Our store is making a donation to the United Way this weekend. I will add this in. That way you will have paid this store back and help out others. Deal?”

Kara nodded her head. “Thank you. Is there anyway you can maybe, not mention this, to anyone? Ever?”

The woman laughed slightly, remembering the last buzz of federal activity when this girl showed up.

“I think that would be best. I won’t mention this to anyone, ever. I am just glad you and your baby brother are okay. Maybe now I won’t think back on it as the night we chased a homeless girl and baby who were being chased by bad people, out of this store. It’s better I don’t ask your name, I guess?”

“Probably so.” Kara admitted.

“Then thank you for letting me know. I am glad you are okay. You really are lovely. Good luck to you.”

“Thank you.”

Kara walked calmly but quickly, glasses in place and head down towards the front and out the door without incident. It was an unnecessary risk but unless the manager mentioned something over social media, which she doubted, Kara doubted that Astra would look here ever, especially with the glasses protecting her face from scanning.

Still, it was a foolish risk but one she had to take. Maybe her family were criminals, liars and murderers but Kara Danvers had her own honor to uphold as best she could.

“Get that taken care of?” Alex asked. “So this was the store you pulled the great escape from?”

The blonde nodded her head.

“Just when I think you can’t surprise me anymore, you pull something like this. You would never have let this go, would you?”

“No, but the scales are somewhat balanced now. I doubt I will ever find the family I stole the backpack from, or want to find the man who Connolly crippled but I could right this wrong. Have you programmed in our next destination?”

“Yeah. One of your old camp grounds?” Alex guessed.

“Nope, just a spot I thought looked nice. I was researching campgrounds we could stop at. We aren’t very far off course. This one will have a clear view of the night sky with no trees impeding our vision. I can talk you to sleep while giving you a tour of the stars.”

“Oh yay.” Alex practically moaned. “Dad is your star gazing buddy, not me.”

Kara shook her head and put her helmet on. “Most people would be very excited to have an astronomy lesson given by an alien.” she pointed out.

“The novelty of living with an alien ended when I went to the bathroom after you, the night Mom tried to make enchiladas. Whatever place we wind up getting, needs two bathrooms. Though I’m not sure if there are many one bedrooms with two baths.”

The two girls rode off, Kara on the back, thinking about what Alex just said. She had questions but they could wait. Alex was driving over the speed limit and if she made the slightest mistake, Kara would be in the air with her while watching her pride and joy crumbling on the pavement below.

Two hours later, the duo pulled over. The sun was setting and both girls struggled with the small tent in the back pack.

“You have to hold your end down and steady, Alex.”

“No, because if I do then you will break it. They aren’t meant to bend.”

“Yes they are! How can you not get this? Tents are generally domes. That means they have support rods that curve.”

“No, they curve by adding different pieces together.”

“No they don’t. I’ve done this before.” Kara reminded her, again.

“Once! Let me see the directions again.”

“Move.” Kara ordered. Alex stood with her arms crossed. “Move Alex. I can have this done in seconds.”

“No. Give me the directions. I want to do it. We are going to do it. Teamwork, remember?”

“Then why won’t you follow my directions?”

“Because I am the team leader.” the older sister argued.

“Then the team leader doesn’t know how to put together a tent which is the whole purpose of the team! Will you please just try it my way and if it doesn’t work we can do it your way until we run out of pieces before the thing is done?”

“Fine. So slip this into the peg?”

“Yes.” Kara told her gratefully.

“I still think you are going to… oh… okay. I see what you are doing. Uh… keep doing that. Now do it again…”

Kara didn’t bother not rolling her eyes. “Thanks team leader. Where would I be without your direction?”

“No sarcasm on this team unless it is from the team leader.”

Once the tent was erected the two laid a blanket out and gathered firewood from around the area, Kara breaking off a few limbs that may not have naturally fallen. They made a perfect triangle of sticks and a small beam of heat vision gave them a roaring fire.

“We need marshmallows, graham crackers and chocolate. You should have picked some up in the grocery store.” Alex told her, still in team leader mode.

“Sorry, I was kind of caught up in the past. I was so scared that night. You have no idea. Anyway, I think we have something else to talk about, don’t we? So lets lay it out on the table, no therapist, no family meetings or me having some breakdown or another. Why did you say we were looking for a one bedroom?”

Alex sat down on the blanket next to Kara and took her hand.

“Because… a lot of reasons. For one, a one bedroom is cheaper. We have always shared a room so what is different now? Two, you aren’t going to be in therapy any longer which I have said is a very bad idea but your choice. Still, I want to be near you, so if you have nightmares I will know. This is going to be a big change for both of us and you know you don’t like change. Being in an apartment, you are going to have to learn to drown out the sounds of neighbors above and below us, all the voices in the city, you know how Metropolis bothered you. If you aren’t going to continue therapy then I need to be… we need to share a room.”

“I am not a baby.” Kara retorted. “We are sharing an apartment, it isn’t like we are going to be miles from each other. You deserve your own room where you can sleep all night instead of listening to me mumble and scream. Not that I scream often anymore. You get the point. We are getting a two bedroom.”

“Only if you keep going to therapy.” Alex told her quietly.

“Excuse me? You are giving me ultimatums about therapy? Are you going to keep going?”

“Yeah, I am.” Alex told her, surprising Kara. “We have come a long way but we aren’t there yet, Kara.”

“You mean I am not there.” she told Alex quietly, a bit embarrassed.

“If you aren’t there, we aren’t there. Me and Mom and Dad all agreed…”

“You talked about this without me?” she caught quickly.

Alex shrugged her shoulders. “It wasn’t like we planned a secret meeting. It isn’t just me that wants you with me. Mom and Dad think it is a good idea if we are together, since you basically kicked Jess to the curb.”

“I didn’t kick her to the curb. I just said it was over. It should be. I have done enough.”

“No you haven’t. We aren’t going to be together all day Kara. Is sharing a room with me that bad?”

“It is when I know you are doing it because you, Mom and Dad think I can’t take care of myself, even at night!”

“Go back to therapy and prove that you can. Then we can think about moving into a two bedroom. It doesn’t matter anyway. Mom and Dad are paying for this and they make the decisions on how many bedrooms.”

“And you should back me! You said when you went to college you would date. Like seriously think about having a real, regular girlfriend occasionally. Us sharing a room would definitely make that awkward.”

Alex’s mouth dropped open for a bit and she shook her head. “You seriously think I would have sex in the apartment when you are there? Kara it wouldn’t matter if you were in a different room. I don’t even know how to have sex but I can imagine noise that I don’t want you to hear is going to be involved. I will be going to this hypothetical girlfriend’s apartment, not ours.”

“We are getting two rooms. Maybe I don’t want to share a room. Maybe I want my own space.” she suggested unconvincingly.

“No you don’t. Kara, why is this a big deal?”

“Because I am not your responsibility! I shouldn’t have to be. You have given so much…”

“Stop it.” Alex told her. “Always with this same crap. I don’t feel like I have to do anything. We are sharing a room, Dad said we are getting a one bedroom. If you don’t want to sleep in the same room with me, sleep on the couch but its not up for discussion unless you want to take it up with him and Mom.”

“Fine. As long as we are talking about Mom and Dad and discussions, isn’t it time you told them? Or are we going to wait for a holiday and bring home the girlfriend? I am good with that, honestly I am great with that because… I mean epic awesomeness, but they should probably be given a heads up. You have been avoiding this for years. Its time you told them.”

“I will when the time is right.”

“The time is right.”

“You don’t get to make that call.”

“You make calls for me all the time. I am making this one. Deal with it.”

“No… okay, yeah it is probably past time. I’m just… nervous. I know I shouldn’t be but this is a big deal. Yeah you took it well but thats you. I could tell you I killed someone and you would help me hide the body.”

Kara laughed. “Don’t be ridiculous. Why would I hide a body for you when I could burn the soft tissues and stomp the bones into dust in under a minute?”

Kara continued laughing until she noted Alex wasn’t.

“It seriously disturbs me how thought out and quick that was.” the older sister told her, then shook her head. “Regardless, I am nervous and need a little time. Christmas break…”

“No, before they go back to Midvale.”

“Not your decision!”

“Yes it is. I called it, its mine.” the blonde stressed.

“Fine. You keep going to therapy and I will tell them.”

“No. I am done. Not up for negotiation. Keep the secret from them, but I am done. I am good, I can handle life, I am not suicidal, I have not hurt myself in months, I have not had a panic attack…”

“Kara stop. Just forget it. Making you go, I couldn’t anyway and you would just be angry that you were there instead of getting anything done. You stay in denial about your problems like, I don’t know, extreme anger that eats you up until it explodes, usually on some poor boulder or Martian. I will stay in the closet in regards to Mommy and Daddy until I decide it is the right time.”

Kara sat up straight and crossed her arms, pouting.

“There must be something you want. What if I agreed to go on a date this semester?”

That offer caught Alex’s attention.

“A date? A real date? You think a guy is cute, he asks you out and you actually say yes?”

“Yep. I will go on a date.”

“And threaten to kill him when he asks where you grew up.” Alex guessed.

“That was different. That bald headed… he had no right. No, I won’t threaten to kill him. One date and you let Mom and Dad know.”

“Three dates. Three bonafide, no wishy washy stuff, but three legitimate dates. Can be with the same guy or different guys. Your call.”

“And you tell the parental units?”

“After your…”

“Nope. I just paid back a grocery store I stole from nearly five yeas ago. You know I am good for it. I give you my word. Before they leave National City you tell them.”

Alex took a deep breath and laid on her back, adjusting her small pillow.

“Fine. You have a deal. I am picking the clothes you wear on these dates. Thats final. The blonde bombshell is coming out, not the librarian.”

Three days later, the two girls, Kara feeling great and Alex with a very sore ass from riding across country on a bike that was not designed for cross country cruising, met Jeremiah, Eliza and a very grumpy Clark at an apartment finder agency and began the search. It was not easy.

Kara attempted to talk Jeremiah and Eliza into a two bedroom to Alex’s irritation but Jeremiah’s look told her this would not happen so she let the subject drop. An agent drove the family around National City, allowing them all to take in the sights and Kara to act like the new noises didn’t bother her. Being on the road for the last four days was heaven for her. It reminded her of her first cross country trip but without being hunted, having to take care of a baby, starving and being attacked. She felt free and alive and for four days, her mind was not on future battles, or paranoia, fear, or anger. She didn’t think about fighting, sparring, running her movements in her head over and over, fighting numerous battles in her mind before they ever happened. She didn’t feel anxious, although she did listen constantly for everything from miles around because the habit had developed to the point she did it unconsciously.

“I can’t believe you two want to live here. It stinks. Everything stinks.” Clark grumbled. Despite what could be the grumblings of a sad boy who thought he was losing his sisters, everyone was alert. It was Kara who asked the question aloud.

“Clark, what do you mean it stinks? What does it smell like?”

“Like the bathroom after you and Alex used it that time Mommy tried to make the ench…”

“We get it. Its just because we are going over a sewer drain. I smell it too. It will get better. There are a few every ten blocks. Have you been smelling different things in Midvale? Things you haven’t smelt before?”

“Nope. Why? Am I supposed to?”

Kara shook her head. “No, little one, I was just wondering. Is the smell getting better?”

Clark took a long whiff.

“It’s not as strong.”

Kara felt a bit of relief. He shouldn’t have been able to smell the underground sewer tunnel but at least it was passing. She wasn’t stupid, she knew the day would come when his powers would emerge. She hoped if they came on slowly, like a sense of smell and maybe a bit of X ray vision followed by dizziness, he would be okay, able to handle it better. He would have support, support she didn’t have when hopping out of a space ship, fully powered, not knowing how to use any of them. Her powers came to her in a matter of hours. If his could stretch out over a few years it would be so much better.

“You should come back to Midvale. No sewer pipes.” he grumbled, shifting between the two of them in the back of the van.

Kara looked at Alex who slightly shook her head with a stern look in Kara’s direction.

“Maybe I should.” she whispered over his head. “I don’t have to go to college. I would have more time to set things up and search more area. If they aren’t at Fort…”

“No. You are going to college, we are going to college. Mom and Dad know what to expect and you can be there in an hour if they need you. You are not doing this on your own. We can both go to UNC Raleigh but that is it.” Alex told her.

Kara shook her head. Alex was right. The blonde had promised to go to college and planned to use the time to work on her fortress. She had packed the crystals in one of her bags that Jeremiah and Eliza had brought. The rest of their belongings would be shipped as soon as they had an address but the clothes and the crystals were here. Kara had an idea her adoptive parents weren’t crazy about her having them but neither said anything. She was thankful they got through security but they looked no different than ordinary crystals on Earth and those were allowed on planes.

Alex was excited about NCU and if Kara didn’t attend Alex would follow her. Kara owed it to her.

The apartment shopping did not go well. Eliza and the girls liked a few places and Jeremiah found something wrong with every one of them, especially the two bedrooms the finder tried to sneak in.

It was on the seventh try that three out of the four, Clark abstaining, hit gold.

“I don’t like it. There are too many windows.” Kara told the three. “Anyone can see in.”

“Miss, I assure you, being on the seventh floor, no one will see inside. The view of the city is amazing.”

The apartment finder was getting very frustrated. The father had been hell to please and now the quiet blonde didn’t like the best feature of the place?

“The entire wall isn’t covered in windows. We could put the table there and have an amazing view. We can put the couch over there, TV in front, flows into the bedroom. The bedroom is bigger than our bedroom at home.” Alex argued. “There is an underground parking garage where you can keep your baby.”

“Yeah, I guess.” the blonde admitted.

“The windows open…” Alex hinted strongly, determined that this would be where they were going to live. “Look at the view. I can see you having your canvas right here by the window, looking out over the city.”

Kara recognized the slight pleading tone in Alex’s voice. Despite what she considered a defensive weak point with so many windows, it did stand to reason that any Kryptonian looking wouldn’t be stopped by a wall or unable to see through one for that matter.

“Okay, lets take it.”

“Really? Dad?” Alex looked at her father hopefully. The man grudgingly nodded his head.

Six hours later, a lease had been signed and bags brought in. Kara’s motorcycle had a new home as well.

That night the parents and children sat on the floor of the as of yet unfurnished apartment and had three pizza boxes laid in the middle of the circle they formed. Furniture shopping would be done tomorrow and the next day Jeremiah, Eliza and Clark Danvers would leave their two girls in National City for the next four years at least. Kara and Alex would have one week to learn the city and prepare for the start of the semester. Alex was excited, having already tested out of most basics this summer she would be starting on core classes, not sitting in freshman level science and math classes with thousands of other students.

Kara was in no such hurry. While Alex had determined to be nearly finished with a Masters in four years and onto a PhD program in Bioengineering with a specialty in genetics Kara decided to obtain a Bachelors degree in graphic design. The blonde had researched a number of possible careers in the event she actually survived defeating the Fort Rozz escapees and Non, and decided that was the career she could show some interest in, since it combined her love of entertainment with her love of art. Though she tested out of many of the same classes Alex did, some she decided to not forgo, like English. Kara had serious doubt she would have passed the accreditation class on that one regardless. She was still not a fan of Shakespeare or any olde English author for that matter.

“ Are you going to tell them now? They are leaving in two days and we will be busy shopping tomorrow.” Kara reminded her, annoying Jeremiah and Eliza like every time the two girls spoke in their sister language as they told Clark it was called.

“ We are sitting on the floor of an empty apartment. Probably not the best time.”

“ There is no best time or worst time. You act like you are telling them you are burning your arms or something. Oh, wait. Yes, that was what I had to do when you called the therapist without telling me first.”

“ You have really got to let that go.”

“ Tell them.”

“ No, later.”

“ No later, now. Clark can go take a bath and the three of you can talk.”

“ No, you are going to be with me.”

“ Fine.”

“Could someone please speak English and clue the rest of us in?!” Jeremiah practically shouted, causing Eliza to jump a bit from her seated position and Clark to giggle.

“Alex would like to talk to the two of you about something. Clark why don’t you check the shower out and see if it works good. There are some towels in my black duffle bag.” Kara told him.

“No, I want to hear…”

“Do as you are told.”

Clark recognized Kara’s tone of voice. There were times Kara was playful with him, calling him a spoiled brat for not doing what he was told and hanging him upside down by his ankles and tickling his feet until he squealed an apology. There were also times when Kara told him to do something, he did it without hesitation. Though she had never raised her voice at him, he knew instinctively that unlike Alex, when his blonde big sister wanted him to do something she expected it to be done.

The little boy hopped up and practically ran out of the room.

“Kara…” Eliza started.

“I am just teaching him discipline. He was not yelled at or punished.”

“I know but it is natural for a boy to want to be involved in family discussions. Did you have to be so short?”

Kara looked at the floor and mumbled an apology.

“None of that. I know you mean well. He is very well behaved and that is in no small part to you.” Eliza comforted her. “Now what would you like to talk to us about Alex?”

Alex froze, trying to keep track of her emotional reactions. Irritated that Kara had put her on the spot, relieved that she had an in, hopeful that Clark would not leave, secretly glad that Kara was being spoken to again about being short and demanding with Clark and sad when she realized this was probably how Kara was raised in her early years. The girl had often told Alex that on Krypton children did as their parents instructed. There was no other option. Now the ball was in her court.

“Uh… yeah. See, there is something I have known for a long time but never really wanted to talk about. Its kind of personal and I know, or at least I think I know you guys would be cool with it, but I just haven’t really found the right time. Its kind of different and will probably be a bit of a shock at first…”

“Alex honey, no matter what it is, you can tell us. You know this, right?” Jeremiah asked calmly, while on the inside praying she didn’t have an addiction or an eating disorder.

“Yeah, of course… so here goes…”

Alex took a very deep breath and met Kara’s encouraging eyes.

“Kara is gay.” she said very quickly.

Both parents looked at Kara who had titled her head back and was staring at the ceiling, frustrated.

“Kara? You are gay?” Eliza asked doubtfully. Despite her denial of being attracted to anyone because it wouldn’t work out in her mind, Kara did seem to have a major infatuation with Justin Timberlake and Eliza would be lying if she said she hadn’t noticed at times Kara stared at Dante like she stared at Pot Stickers. Thankfully neither Dante nor Jeremiah had ever caught wind of that.

Kara for her part, shrugged her shoulders.

“I guess I am now. Okay then, that is all she wanted.”

“No wait.” Alex told them. “That isn’t true. Kara isn’t gay, I am.”

No one said anything for a moment. Eliza finally broke the silence.

“Alex, how long have you known this?”

The brunette shrugged her shoulders. “Since I was 13 probably. I only told Kara.”

“You have known for six years and never said anything?” Jeremiah asked. “Why didn’t you tell us before? Why did you feel the need to keep this a secret?”

“I don’t know. I was scared. Scared of… maybe it would make it… I don’t know.”

The parents and kids were quiet for a moment, none knowing exactly what to do with this. Finally Jeremiah broke the silence.

“Alex… have we done something that would make you uncomfortable telling us this before? Have we ever done anything that would make you think you would have to hide this? Please be honest, because if we have, we want to know.”

“No!” she told her father quickly. She could tell he was upset but not why. “You two have always supported me. It wasn’t about you, it was about… I don’t know. I guess I just thought there was no hurry. It wasn’t like I would have met anyone in Midvale anyway… I didn’t want you to… I know how much you love us but Clark… I thought maybe one day you two would want grandkids or something and that was never going to happen but this would kinda…”

“Alex, we want you to be happy. That is all that matters, not grandchildren.” Eliza told her. “Besides being gay does not limit what you can do in this life. If you want children one day you can, there are ways, but you have to be true to yourself. What you want out of life is what is important.”

“So you aren’t upset?” Alex asked.

“Not that you are gay. I… we, I think, are upset you felt the need to keep this from us. We would never be disappointed in you. There is no way that could happen.” Her mother told her fiercely. Jeremiah reached over and pulled his daughter into his arms. Alex cried, from relief or happiness, she wasn’t sure.

Clark let it be known that he could not get the shower the correct temperature. Kara stood up quickly and walked to the bathroom, leaving the three in the living room alone, happy that Alex had finally opened up to the most important people in her life about something she hid for no good reason in Kara’s mind.

Walking into the bathroom, she found Clark wrapped in a towel, trying to adjust knobs.

“Let me, little one.” the blonde offered.

Clark turned around and his face dropped a bit. “Is Mommy busy?”

Kara looked away for a moment. “I guess you are mad at me?”

“No… yeah kinda. I just wanted to know. I didn’t mean to make you mad.”

“You didn’t make me mad.” Kara told him.

“Yes I did. When I ask Mommy something or Alex or Daddy they answer me or at least tell me why I can’t do something. You tell me what to do. I’m scared not to. I don’t know why. Why are you so bossy?”

Kara got on her knees, eye level with her younger adopted brother.

“I’m sorry.”

“You always say that and you keep doing it.” the little boy told her.

The blonde clenched her jaw and closed her eyes, forcing herself to count to ten in her head.

“Clark, I am sorry. The way I was raised, we did as our parents said. We did not question. When I was your age, I did as I was told, no questions asked. I realize this isn’t the way you have been raised and I forget that sometimes. I am doing the best I can.”

“What do you mean you were raised? Mommy would talk to you the way you talk to me?”

“No! Not Mom. Not Dad either. There are things about my childhood that you don’t know. Things I will tell you when you are older. I promise. But not now.”

“Did you have a different Mommy and Daddy? Is that why Alex and I have dark hair and you have blonde hair? Mommy has blonde hair. I thought that was why you have blonde hair.”

“Clark, I didn’t have a different Mommy and Daddy. I… its complicated and I will tell you one day. I am sorry I was short with you. I don’t mean to be so bossy. I love you and I want you to be the best kid you can and Mom and Dad are doing a good job with that, better than I could. But there are times I am going to forget that I am not your mother. When I say I am sorry I mean it, but that doesn’t mean it won’t happen again. I am very far from perfect.”

“Is it because of your powers? Do they make you crazy? Is that why you get so mad and have nightmares? Is that why you have to talk to Jessica all the time? I wake up sometimes because you are screaming. Do the powers hurt you? Do they make you hurt yourself? Are they why you are so bossy and mad sometimes? Why doesn’t Alex have them? Is it because you had a different Mommy and Daddy?”

“Enough!” Kara told him, trying to keep her voice low to not disturb the three in the living room but unable to hide her frustration. Clark sensed that he had pushed to far. Kara’s entire face was bright red and it wasn’t from embarrassment.

“Let me get the water right and you can take a shower. I told you all this will be explained one day but today is not the day. Do not ask again and do not bring this up to our parents. I will explain when I think the time is right. I am not crazy, Clark. I love you. I love you so much and if there are things I don’t tell you, then it is for your own good. Move aside so I can get your shower ready.”

Clark did so, stepping aside and not saying another word. Even at five years old, the boy realized he had come close to pushing Kara over the edge and there were no boulders or trees for her to break nearby.

Six days later, a tearful goodbye between the girls and their parents, a quiet Clark that Kara was pretty sure wouldn’t be missing her and four days of becoming settled, finding the best Chinese and pizza delivery services and touring the campus of NCU, Alex and Kara sat on their couch watching television, and eating ice cream.

“This isn’t a horrible show.” Kara admitted, seeing the first episode of Homeland. “Kind of violent. Dad might like it.”

“Dad? I love it. I can tell Danes’ character is going to be awesome.” Alex told her. Despite the assertion that she would be researching diseases and their cures one day, the brunette still believed she would be a full time DEO agent, once the Fort Rozz escapees were dealt with. She would back Kara up until then, because there was no way Alex could take orders from J’onn instead of being there for Kara. But once it was over Alex knew her training and scientific knowledge would be too much for the DEO to turn down. She hoped that Kara would find something else when it was over, that she would be tired of fighting. Her biggest hope was one day her little sister would be the graphic designer she said she wanted to be or a singer or street artist trying to make it big. Anything but a soldier.

“Besides since when do you not like violent shows?”

“Since my younger brother slash cousin thinks I am a psycho.” The blonde groused,

“Kara, he doesn’t think you are a psycho. You know he misses you. He clung to you before they boarded the plane.”

“He likes you better.”

Alex shook her head. “No, he doesn’t. Sometimes he doesn’t know how to act around you and that throws him off. He is five, It will get better.”

“He is almost six. He smelt a sewer pipe ten feet underground from a moving car. He is going to get powers. What am I going to say then, Alex? He is going to hate me. He is going to be upset and… he is going to hate me. I have loved him since birth. I am the only one who has loved him from the start of his life for no ulterior motive. But instead of hating his bastard father, he is going to hate me for protecting him from the truth. I hope Jor El is enjoying whatever flames he is burning in because I promise he is laughing at me. Our family wiped out a planet, committed genocide on an unprecedented scale, used us and especially Clark for their own purposes and I will be the one who is hated. He will forgive everyone else. He will never forgive me.”

“Kara, stop. We can tell him soon. Maybe next year. You are right, he isn’t old enough but I think the smell thing was a fluke. He has a few more years I am betting. If we explain it to him so he knows what to expect…”

“It wasn’t a fluke and he could wake up tomorrow with a new life. He could kick a soccer ball and it would explode or fly a few hundred yards. Once that happens, everything he loves is gone. Soccer, baseball, even the pee wee football league he wants to play in next year. What happens if he becomes angry in a game and suddenly hits a kid as hard as he can? What if his strength kicks in and that kid gets… my strength came quickly. I was becoming stronger by the hour and Clark’s cries let me know. By the end of the first day here I was holding him like glass.”

“But they still came on gradually, even if it was a few hours. He isn’t going to suddenly be able to lift a couple thousands tons in an instant.” Alex pointed out. “Lets not worry right now. Clark will never hate you. I won’t allow him to.”

“Thats the funny thing about hate, Alex. You really can’t control who you feel it towards. I don’t want to hate my parents but I do.”

Alex moved over and wrapped her arms around her little sister who relaxed into her. No amount of talking would make Kara feel better but hugging always did the trick, at least for a little while.

While Alex showered, Kara checked the time and knew that even in a different time zone, Eliza would be up, working. She called her cell instead of the house phone.

“Kara? Is everything okay?”

“No, not really. I miss you.”

Eliza let out a breath. The woman had been terrified since she left that something would happen, even something not related to Fort Rozz.

“I miss you too, sweetie. So much.”

“Did Dad look at the stars tonight?” she asked. Her and Jeremiah star gazed often but Sunday night was a reserved night that was never broken.

“Of course. Not as long. I think he missed you too much but he said he wouldn’t break tradition.”

“What did you cook for dinner tonight?” she asked.

“Roasted herb chicken and mashed potatoes.” Eliza told her.

“Did you put the cheese and bacon bits in the potatoes?”

“Of course.” the mother told her with a chuckle.

“I love when you do that. I… I wish I was there. I didn’t want to leave. You know that, right?”

In Midvale, Eliza dropped her head, a tear escaping. The sadness in Kara’s voice was killing her.

“I know, Kara. If you want, you can come back. Alex will stay to go to college, I promise. You can attend a local college and stay here…”

“I can’t. Alex will follow me and I don’t want to leave her anyway. Plus, you know why I have to be here.”

“Kara, they could be anywhere.” Eliza tried. “If you are going to be there, be there for the right reasons. Be there because you want to go to college, plan for the future.”

“I know. Its funny, I wake up twice a night, expecting to hear you or Dad next to my bed. I know you thought you were being quiet but I knew you checked on me every night. It must be nice to get a whole nights sleep, doesn’t it? You don’t have to worry about me now.”

“We will always worry about you. As far as sleeping, your father and I both still wake up. I have walked to your room three times this week at 4 AM and panicked when you weren’t in bed. Then I remembered, you and Alex were living your lives. That is what you have to do. Say the word and we will all move to National City or nearby.”

“No.” Kara told her. “I miss you all really bad but no. I want Clark to grow up where I did. It is so beautiful and I want to come back home one day. I want it to be there and you have to keep him safe, protected from this, hidden. I just need to hear your voice. I am scared about tomorrow. I have always been with Alex. I don’t think I realized until this week how much we were together. We were together all day in school, all day in the summer, every weekend. Tomorrow she isn’t going to be there to talk me through classes or keep me calm. There are going to be a lot of new people. I’m going to be on my own and I guess it is just now really hitting me. This is a bad idea, isn’t it? I should stay inside, here. I can get a job. I can help with rent and food. College isn’t that important. It’s not like I want to be a doctor or lawyer.”

Eliza rubbed her forehead on the other end of the line. She so much wanted to beg Kara to come home. The house was empty, Clark was sad and had left on a bad note with Kara. Jeremiah was constantly ringing his hands and doing odds and ends to keep his mind off of his two girls. Alex in a large environment, learning about who she is, hoping she wasn’t taken advantage of. Alex was tough but people were mean, not just evil aliens. A small town girl like her could be taken advantage of. Kara could have a panic attack and the first thing that would happen is an ambulance called. If a paramedic tried to start an IV while she was unconscious the fall out would be great. He also worried about her acting recklessly, letting her anger override her common sense if she did find alien escapees, harming herself, becoming so depressed that she wouldn’t get out of bed for weeks at a time instead of just days.

“Kara, you are going to college. You are too bright and gifted not to be whatever you want to be. College is going to help you grow, not just academically or artistically. You are going to have to interact with the world. As much as I want to, I can’t hide you away forever. You have too much to offer the world and it has nothing to do with Fort Rozz. Say the word and I am on a plane to National City but you can’t quit before you have even begun. You just can’t Kara. It wouldn’t be fair to you.”

Kara closed her eyes, thinking of Eliza’s face. She could almost match the expressions to her tones of voice.

“I love you Mom. Tell Dad I love him. Sleep tonight, okay? I haven’t hurt myself. I won’t.”

She heard a sigh on the other end. “I… we love you too, Kara. Call me after class and let me know how it went, promise?”

“I promise. Good night.”

The next day, Kara and Alex stood in the covered parking garage of the building. Alex had a helmet in hand but Kara did not. Instead the blonde stood in a full length tan skirt and white blouse, her glasses in place and hair pinned tightly in a bun at the back of her head.

“Are you sure about this? Alex asked.

“Your classes are on the other side of campus. You need to drive, you have a parking permit. Just be careful with my baby. Take care of you too while you are at it.”

“I can give you a ride.” she told Kara, again.

“I’m a ten minute walk from my three classes. I can handle it. I promise I won’t get tired.”

The two hugged and separated, for the first time, going separate ways during a school day. Kara shook her head, picked up her backpack from the ground and began the short walk to the NCU campus.

The closer she got, the greater the desire to run. What started out as a crowded, busy sidewalk was turning into a mass of humanity, standing closely to one another, talking, laughing, asking for directions. Student organizations had booths asking people to sign up, fraternities and sororities were asking for pledges and handing out party invitations.

Kara wandered into the crowd, head down and arms crossed tightly. She raised her head, just enough to see the building she needed to go towards and then continued walking, head down.

Students bumped into her and off of her, a few surprised but most so absorbed in what they were doing, they didn’t pay attention to the fact that they had just bumped into the equivalent of a concrete post.

Once inside the classroom, it did not get better. Kara quickly scanned the seats and saw there were over two hundred students in freshman level English.

A blonde haired man sat down in the seat on one side of her and a young red headed girl took the other side of her. She never had anyone sit this close to her in class beside Alex. Everyone in Midvale knew Kara liked her space.

“Hi! I’m Brandon.” the man next to her introduced himself. Kara froze but her face went to its automatic blending in mode. Her eyes squinted and she smiled, perfect white teeth shining.

“Thank you.” she said, then realized that wasn’t the right thing to say. Now her heart was racing.

“Uh… your welcome? You can repay the favor by telling me your name?”

Kara’s smile stayed on her face but no words were coming. Feeling a bit uncomfortable the man stood up and walked away from the crazy smiling blonde who could not even say her name. He wondered briefly if she spoke English despite being in an English class. The girl next to her laughed.

“Thats one way to get rid of them. Nice job.” she told the blonde approvingly.

Kara stared straight ahead, still smiling, her left hand balled up in a fist and her fingernails biting into her palms.

The teacher began and class quieted down. He explained the attendance policies. Each student would be required to sign in as they arrived. The course syllabus was read and class let out. Kara was surprised. It was obvious the teacher, or professor, she supposed, did not care to know any of his students. They were names on a paper his grad assistant used to take roll and drop or fail those who missed too often. There would be no discussion, only lectures, no tests, only papers. Once the room had emptied, Kara took deep breaths and counted backwards from a hundred, flexing and relaxing her muscles over and over. When she felt ready, she stood.

She had two more classes today and two tomorrow. Next a beginners Adobe InDesign course, part of her major, followed by French, part of her language requirements for a Bachelor of Arts.

The computer class was better, as each student had their own work station but with 52 students it was twice as large as any class she had in Midvale.

After class, Kara noted that she had twelve missed texts and three missed calls from her silenced phone. Rather than responding to the texts she called.

“Why haven’t you answered?” Alex greeted, not sounding happy.

“Sorry, I had my phone on silent, for class remember?”

“Check your phone in class. That is why I texted. Are you okay? You don’t sound good.”

“I sound fine and I am fine.” the blonde lied. “How are you? Classes fun?”

“We have only gone over syllabuses all day but the lab is amazing. You have one more class then you are going to the apartment, right? Do you want to get something to eat? I don’t have to make the last class, I can leave with you.”

“Don’t start skipping class already. I am fine. I have one more class then I am going back. I will be there when you get there, I promise. I am fine.”

Kara moved, trying to break free of the hordes of students exiting the buildings. She finally forced her way into the Language Arts building and found her classroom. The class was larger than English, at least 250 students in a great lecture hall setting. She was approached by three men this time and did not bother trying to talk or introduce herself. She couldn’t even muster a fake smile. The sounds of the entire campus were threatening to overwhelm her, the smells making it hard to breathe. Kara had not had this happen to her in years. She always had control of her senses now. She tried to sort out the voices and find Alex’s but was unable. Her shaking would not stop.

“Please hold it together. Please hold it together. Please hold it together.” she mumbled over and over. The girl next to her noticed and moved a few chairs away. Kara took a syllabus that was passed down and didn’t wait this time for the others to leave. The blonde practically bowled her way through the mass and did not stop moving until she reached the sidewalk outside of campus. Only taking a few breaths, she realized the shaking was not going to stop and hurried as fast as a human could, towards her apartment. Alex was calling but Kara did not trust herself to answer. She had to get to the apartment. Her palms were bloody and her face pale, and if Alex had seen her at the moment, she would have them both on the first flight back to Midvale.

Once inside the apartment, she managed to calm herself enough for her shaking fingers to text Alex that she was home and okay.

She lied.

Kara curled up on the couch, brought her knees into her chest and hid her head in her arms. Alex had texted back she thought but couldn’t look. She didn’t want to. She just wanted the shaking to stop. Her heart was racing and she felt like she couldn’t breathe.

The blonde grabbed and began twisting one of her fingers.

Then she stopped. Taking her phone in her shaking hand she hit a name in her contacts she never thought she would dial again.

“Kara?”

“I was wrong. I’m not ready. I’m not ready Jess. I’m scared.” Kara told her quickly, fighting back the sobs.

“Is your door unlocked?”

“Y… Yes…”

“Hang on for a couple minutes.”

Kara dropped the phone and clenched her fists, fighting off a panic attack, fighting the urge to hurt herself, to let the pain focus her and give her something else to concentrate on.

A minute and fifteen seconds later, Jessica Ryan entered the apartment. She rushed to the couch and took a knee in front of Kara. Kara looked like a mess, her eyes red, her breathing deep and rapid and tears streaking her cheeks.

“How did you get here so fast?”

“I was nearby just in case you needed me. I knew it would be a hard day for you.”

“I thought I was ready but I’m not, am I?”

“Did you hurt yourself?”

“No. I wanted to but…”

“You called me instead. See? You have made progress. We still have a way to go but every journey has rest stops. We just got through one and now we can keep going, right?”

Kara nodded her head. “Thank you for coming.” she whispered.

Jess wrapped the blonde’s head in her arms.

“Thats what I do. I am here for you, Kara. Lets do our breathing exercises and count backward with me. Then we can talk about what happened and what to expect tomorrow. Sound like a plan?”

Kara nodded her head, beginning to calm down.

“Yes, it sounds like a good plan.”