Bella MacLeod's Twilight Fanfiction

To Love Again

By Mama4Dukes

Chapter 04:

One month later…

Embry’s POV

My imprint was suffering immensely. I felt her pain, and my wolf wasn’t happy. The day her husband died I knew. I knew because I was watching a game with the pack, and I doubled over in pain and cried in agony. I wanted to go to her, but I couldn’t. It took everything I had in me to not phase and start pawing it to California. In the end, Paul and Quil had to stay with me all night in wolf form so I would remain calm and not jump the gun. The next morning, Charlie received a phone call from Renee stating that Bella’s husband had been tragically killed on their way back from their honeymoon in Hawaii, and that Bella was completely devastated.

Charlie and Sue immediately left for California. When they returned after the funeral, they informed us that Bella was barely functioning, and that her mother was staying with her to take care of her. The pull to go to her was enormous by then. Jacob had to give me an alpha order to stay put because I was going out of my mind. I even missed a week of work because the pull was so strong. I called in to the tribal school where I taught and told them I was suffering from a fever and a case of the flu. Fortunately, the flu was actually going around the reservation so it was a plausible excuse.

I sat in my room, reading a book. I still lived with my mother and Billy. Jake’s old room had become mine while he and his imprint Kia lived in my mother’s old house. They had a six-year-old son named Kyle. Jake and I had grown apart throughout the years. The reason for this was Kia. I had been dating Kia for years, since my sophomore year in high school. She was from the Makah Reservation. We were each other’s first everything and I loved her. Then, one day, in the beginning of our senior year she surprised me with a visit in La Push because she finally got her driver’s license-that was when Jake imprinted on her. They didn’t even try to fight the imprint for me. Hell, Kia didn’t even bother breaking up with me, and Jake never apologized or anything.

After Jacob and Kia got together, I threw myself into my schoolwork so I wouldn’t think about the two of them together. Sam was Alpha back then, and he made sure Jacob and I never patrolled together. When we were phased together as a pack, I kept running thoughts of my schoolwork through my brain. As a result, Paul, Jared, and Quil ended up graduating from high school with honors, too, because I had inadvertently drilled all of the schoolwork into their brains. The four of us ended up going away for college-Paul and I in Seattle, and Jared and Quil in Pullman. The elders let us go as long as we promised to return to the reservation. The Cullens had left the area one year prior and we hadn’t detected any vampires in the area. Heck, none of us had even seen any vampires other than the Cullens. And they were true to their word, they were no trouble at all.

There was a knock on the door to my room. It was Paul. In high school, we barely spoke except during pack activities, but during college we became close. He and I leaned on each other for support because we were the only two there from La Push. Truth be told, I wouldn’t have gotten through college without him. There were times when I wanted to give up, but he’d always make me fight. When I was failing both calculus and chemistry, and contemplating quitting, “Do you seriously want to go back to La Push and watch Jake and Kia flaunt their relationship in front of you? When you go back to La Push, you want to return there a better, improved version of you-armed with a degree, more life experiences, a better haircut, and the ability to tell them to go screw themselves. Besides, it’s your fault I’m in this college mess, and I refuse to tackle it alone. So, pull it together, Embry!”

I ended up pulling it together, but I had to change my major from Neuroscience to Teaching, and lost nearly a year of credits. It took me five years, but I finally graduated. Paul surprised everyone by graduating in three years. He stayed to get his master’s degree in educational and counseling psychology so he could make sure I graduated. He really was a true friend.

“I’ve got news. And you’re gonna like it,” Paul stated excitedly.

“What news is that?”

“I was at the gym today and guess who was working out?”

“I don’t know, Paul. Some hot chick?”

“Not just any hot chick, Embry. Your hot chick.”

“Paul, I’m not in the mood for…”

“Your imprint, Embry. It was Bella. She’s back in Forks.”

I bolted to my feet. “What do you mean she’s back in Forks? Charlie didn’t say anything.”

“Probably because he doesn’t know.”

“Why are you telling me this?”

“Oh, I don’t know, Embry. You’ve been moping since you imprinted on her. And I can tell you first hand that trying to fight the imprint is pointless. It hurts.”

“How did she look? Was she okay?”

Paul sighed, “She looked sad. I almost wanted to cry. You know, no one deserves to get someone they love ripped away like she did.”

“Yeah, I know. But I don’t even know what to say to her. I can’t exactly go to her and say, ‘Hey, I know your husband just died, but I’m your destiny because Taha Aki said so. By the way I shift into a gigantic wolf sometimes and I was designed to kill vampires.’”

“Listen, Embry. She looked pretty lonely to me. Maybe you should just start with being her friend, she can probably use one about now. She’s grieving, that much is true, and you’re going to have to give her time to process her grief.”

After Paul left, I was antsy. I couldn’t get thoughts of Bella out of my head. How do I approach her? I phased into wolf form and started running through the woods to think. I found myself outside of Charlie Swan’s old house, the one he had given to Bella as a wedding present. The lights were on and she was on the phone with someone.

“ I don’t know if I can do this. I miss him so much. He was my life,” she sobbed.

“ Bella, you’re strong. You can go on without him. You must go on without him. We all do.”

“ But, Lisa, I have no one. My friends are all back on the reservation at home.”

“ Well, what about the reservation your father lives on? Native Americans tend to be very friendly.”

“ The people at the reservation here are unfriendly. I mean, extremely unfriendly. When I went to my father’s wedding, most people didn’t even acknowledge me. After they were introduced to me, they didn’t even attempt to talk to me. I had the most uncomfortable two days of my life here.”

Damn it! I really couldn’t blame her for feeling that way because everyone ignored her instead of being open and friendly at the wedding. I was one of those people.

“ Maybe the Quileutes are one of those tribes that like to keep their culture their own.”

“ Yeah, I think you’re right, Lisa. I miss Eddie so much.”

“ So do I. But Mark and I miss you, too.”

“ I can always come home, you know.”

“ Absolutely not, I’m going to refuse you entry until you at least go out on three dates.”

“ Can I come home after that?”

“ Bella, you know you’re always welcome here. We explained to you that we only had you leave because you needed to go on with your life. If it were my choice, my son would still be alive and you and he would still be living in the in-law and maybe telling us that you’re having a baby.”

“ We wanted so badly to start a family. I guess the fates had something different in store for us.”

“ Yes, but in the end, life-no matter what tragedies it may bring forth-has a tendency to work itself out. Eddie was such a good soul that those of us who were blessed to have him in our lives will be touched by him forever.”

“ I guess you’re right.”

“ Stay strong, Bella.”

“ I will.”

“ Call me anytime.”

“ I will. I miss you. Tell Mark that I miss him, too.”

“ Okay, goodnight sweetheart.”

“ Goodnight.”

Bella ended the call and started sobbing. “Oh, Eddie, why did you leave me alone in this cruel world? I don’t think I have the strength to go on without you.”

I wanted to go to her, wrap my arms around her, and tell her that I was there for her so badly. I couldn’t though. I stayed in the woods behind her house and waited until she fell asleep to run back to the reservation.

Two weeks passed and I continued observing Bella through her window. I felt like a damned stalker. Bella hadn’t come to La Push yet. She had called Charlie and told him that she was back in town, but didn’t really tell him anything else. I decided to hit the gym earlier than usual. When I arrived, I saw Bella. She was walking into a Pilates class. I made a snap decision and joined in the class. She found a place for her mat in the back row, and I took the spot next to her.

“Bella, right?” I said to her.

“Yes.” She turned to me, trying to place me. “Oh, you’re Embry.”

“That’s right, you remembered.”

“Well, of course, you weren’t feeling so good the night of my father’s wedding reception.”

I wasn’t? Oh, yeah. I lied to her that night. Great start with your imprint, Embry. “Right. Right. I’m better now.”

“So, how long have you been doing Pilates?” she asked.

“This is actually my first time. I heard that it’s really good for conditioning so I thought I’d join in and give it a try.” God, I hope Pilates is good for conditioning. I really don’t know a thing about it.

“Well, it actually helps, in developing your flexibility and posture by developing your core. You use your abs a lot in this class.”

“I’m looking forward to it.”

I got through the one-hour class. I actually didn’t mind it at all. The women kept staring at me because I was the only guy there. After class I asked Bella if she wanted to grab a coffee. She consented, and I took her to the little coffee house across the street and we sat down to talk.

“So, Bella, what brings you back to Forks?”

She stirred her coffee nervously, as if she was contemplating how to reply. It was almost as if her focus was entirely on dissolving the tiny crystals of sugar. She bit down nervously on her bottom lip, closed her eyes, and nodded before opening her eyes and replying, “Oh… My husband passed away suddenly, and I needed a fresh start.”

I wasn’t expecting her to be honest and upfront. Damn, how am I going to reply to her?

“I’m so sorry. I heard about his death from your father. You must be devastated.” I truly was sorry. She looked so sad, and she didn’t deserve to be in the pain she was in.

“I am, but I’m taking it one day at a time. I was surrounded by memories of him in California so I thought I’d move back here and try to go on with my life here in Forks. At least, temporarily.”

No, not temporarily. Please.

“So, what have you done so far, since moving to Forks?”

“Well, I’ve decided to renovate the house that I live in for starters. It’s pretty rundown.”

“Are you going to call in contractors?”

“I’m not sure yet. I’m toying with the idea of doing at least some of the work myself.”

“I can help you. I’m a teacher so I’m off during the summer,” I offered.

“Oh, that’s right. Your mother told me that you were a teacher when I met her at my father’s wedding. I’m a teacher, too.”

“Wow, we have something in common. What do you teach?”

“I’m a special education teacher. I just completed my master’s degree in December.”

“I teach the third and fourth grade class at the tribal school in La Push.”

“Oh, I adore that age group. The kids are still innocent, but just developing their snarkiness. The things that come out of their mouths are so funny.”

“I know, I had one girl in my class last year ask me, ‘Excuse me, Mr. Call. My mother says that all men are brainless idiots. How did you become a teacher?’ “

“What did you say to her?” Bella chuckled.

“Oh, I told her that I went to college and worked hard to earn my teaching degree. I also told her not all men were brainless idiots; to which she replied, ‘I’ll have to talk to my mom. She’s an expert on men. She’s been married three times.’ “

“Oh, my goodness.” She laughed. “The things kids say.”

“Will you be teaching in September?”

“I’m actually in the process of job hunting right now. Forks doesn’t have any openings for special needs teachers at the present time, but I’ve put in applications in Port Angeles and the Makah Reservation.”

“Um, we’re looking for a new special education director in La Push. The woman who used to be the special education director had a baby and decided not to return.”

“Oh, really? Interesting. Thanks for the tip.”

“Sure, no problem.”

“You know, I have experience teaching at a tribal school. My husband was a Mission Indian from California and we lived on the reservation. I taught at the tribal school there, and he was a financial planner at a bank in San Diego.”

“Wow! I’d like to hear about your reservation sometime. Are you a member of the tribe through your husband?”

“Well, no, it’s a bit complicated. Unfortunately, he passed away immediately following our honeymoon before any paperwork could be processed. So, though I do have a marriage certificate, I never applied for tribal membership. In fact, I didn’t even have a chance to do a name change at the DMV for my license and what not. That’s why I’m still Isabella Swan, legally.”

“I really am sorry that your husband was taken from you.”

“It was fate,” she said quickly, and shifted uncomfortably in her seat. She tapped her fingers on the table nervously. “Well, I should get going. It was really nice talking to you, Embry.” She stood up abruptly.

“It was great talking to you, too. Will you be at the gym tomorrow?”

“Yes, I’m there everyday around this time.”

“I’ll see you there, then.”

“That would be nice.” She jogged across the street to her truck as if she couldn’t wait to escape. She drove what looked like a two to three year old Ford F-150. It probably belonged to her husband because it still had California plates on them.”

I drove home to take a shower. I was pretty happy with the results of my encounter with Bella today. One thing was for sure, she was a very open girl and extremely honest, too. It was obvious that she was trying hard to move on with her life. She was trying to be as honest as possible, and I was trying my best to get to know her without the issues of my being a wolf or her being my imprint getting in the way.

For the next two weeks, Bella and I continued our gym and coffee shop routine, and I got to know her fairly well. I really liked her. She was funny and intelligent, and she always spoke her mind. I wanted to ask her out on a date, but I wasn’t exactly sure how to go about it. What if she said no? What if it’s too soon?

On Saturday evening, the pack and imprints had a bonfire on the beach. I decided to go for a walk when I spotted Bella far on the other end of the beach. She was sitting on the sand and watching the waves in the dark.

She was having a conversation, it seemed, with her deceased husband. I hid behind a rock to listen, “How are things Eddie? Things are okay here. I made a friend. His name is Embry. He’s a teacher like I am. He’s very nice. We go to the gym, and then have some coffee together and talk afterwards. Things are getting better for me. I cry a lot less at night now, but I still miss you, Eddie. I wish there were some way for us to visit each other, but you’re in heaven and I’m pretty sure I’m somewhere close to hell. I’ve applied for jobs around the area. I’ve received phone calls from the tribal schools at the Makah Reservation and the Quileute Reservation for interviews. It looks like the Port Angeles School District hired from in-house. Hopefully, I’ll get one of those two jobs. If not, I’ll just take the year off. We had enough in savings so I’ll be okay. Well, I should leave you alone now. I miss you Eddie, and I love you. I know that you wanted me to go on with my life and find someone to love, but I don’t know if I can. I don’t know if I can give my heart to someone else. I just need you, Eddie. I need to sit and tell you about my day at dinnertime and go shopping for groceries on Saturday mornings with you. I need you to hold me when I cry and reassure me when I’m feeling sad. I need you to make love to me until we fall asleep and wake up in your arms in the morning. I need you so much, but I promised you that I would stay strong so I will. I really will. I love you, Eddie.” And then, she broke down and started crying.

I couldn’t stop myself. I found myself making my way to her. I sat down next to her on the sand and put my arm around her. She gasped at first, and then when she noticed it was me, she put her head on my shoulder and continued to cry until she fell asleep. I picked her up and ran with her in my arms to her truck. I located the keys to her vehicle, and drove her home. She stayed asleep the entire time. I scented out her room, tucked her into bed, and kissed her softly on the forehead before running back home in wolf form.

On Sunday, I was restless. My wolf was itching to see Bella, but I didn’t want her to feel overwhelmed. Around five pm, my wolf won the battle. I decided to go and see my imprint. Should I bring her flowers? Maybe I should pick up a cake and bring it to her? Hmm… I walked out of my room and smelled something delicious. In the kitchen, I saw my mother’s beef stew simmering in the crockpot for Sunday dinner. By the looks of it, it was almost done. That should work. I unplugged it, placed the whole thing into the car, and drove to Bella’s house. I rang her doorbell.

“ Who is it?” she called.

“It’s Embry Call.” She opened the door. “Hi, how are you feeling? I… I brought some beef stew.”

“Oh, wow! I haven’t had beef stew in ages. Thank you. Would you like to come in?”

“Sure.” I walked inside and set the crockpot down on the dining table.

“That’s a lot of stew. Will you be joining me for dinner?”

“I’d love to.” She set the table and served some beef stew for each of us. We sat down to eat.

“Did you make this yourself? It’s delicious.”

“No, my mother made it. I can’t take credit for it. I’m not a good cook at all. I can make a mean Reuben though. I load it up with tons of sauerkraut.”

“I love Reubens, you’ll have to make one for me sometime.”

“I’d love to construct a sandwich for you.” In actuality, I would do whatever she wanted.

Bella fiddled nervously, stirring her fork around her stew nervously. She looked into my eyes and spoke earnestly, “Embry, I wanted to thank you for last night. You brought me home and put me to bed, didn’t you?”

“Yeah, I did.”

“Well, thank you. I was at a low point, missing my husband, and you were there for me.”

“You looked like you could use a friend.”

“Yes, I needed one.” She smiled shyly and nodded.

We sat and talked during dinner. She told me about some of the renovations she had planned for her house. She, apparently, had made the decision to have a contractor do the work because she realized she pretty much wanted to gut the house and update the interior. I recommended Sam’s contracting company to her and offered to speak to him if she wanted. She accepted my offer gratefully.

We talked about college. I went to the University of Washington while she attended Stanford University. Apparently, that was where she met her husband. She earned her master’s degree from San Diego State University. I told her I was still in the process of earning mine online. I still had another year or so to go.

We talked until around ten pm before I headed for home with my mother’s washed and empty crock pot. I insisted she refrigerate the leftovers for herself. Of course, I had about four huge helpings so there really hadn’t been much left. She was floored by how much I ate. When I walked into the house, Charlie and Sue were visiting Billy and my mother. They were having cheesecake.

“You know, Embry, I had an entire crockpot full of beef stew ready for dinner. Imagine my surprise when I found the stew had disappeared from the kitchen-crock pot and all,” my mother commented.

“Do you mean this crockpot?” I sheepishly held the empty appliance out in front of me.

She raised a single eyebrow at me. “Well, what happened to our dinner? We had to order pizza.”

“Oh, I thought I’d bring some dinner over to Bella. I told her that you made it especially for her.”

She smiled and chuckled. “That’s fine, sweetheart. Next time, warn me. Did she like it?”

“Yeah, she loved it.”

“Good.”

“How is she doing, Embry?” Charlie asked.

“She misses her husband, but she’s trying to stay strong and move on with life. Oh, and she has an interview at the tribal school here for the special needs director position tomorrow morning, and one at the Makah tribal school on Tuesday.”

“She’s always been an intelligent girl.”

“Yeah, I noticed. Um, I’m going to my room to relax now.”

“You do that, Embry. Oh, and thanks for keeping her company.”

“No problem. I truly enjoy spending time with her.” It was true. I liked being with Bella. Whenever we were together, we never ran out of things to say to each other.

Around five o’clock on Monday, Sam and I made our way to Bella’s house. Emily armed us with cinnamon rolls. We rang the doorbell and she answered right away.

“Embry, what brings you to my house on a Monday night and who is your friend?”

“Bella, this is Sam Uley-my friend. He’s the contractor I told you about. I thought I’d just bring him by so you could tell him your ideas.”

“Oh, sure, come inside. Welcome, Mr. Uley.”

“Please call me Sam. It’s a pleasure to meet you.” He handed Bella a plate. “These cinnamon rolls are from my wife Emily. They’re homemade.”

“My goodness, that wasn’t necessary at all. Please thank her for me.”

“I will. So, what did you want to do with your house?”

Bella told Sam her ideas. He took some measurements and said he’d return in a few days with some plans. She thanked us and we went on our way.

“She really likes you,” Sam noted in the truck. “You should ask her out on a date.”

“Too soon,” I said. “She’s still hung up on her husband.”

“You’re helping her to get over him, though.”

“Yeah, but she really loved him.”

“That’s usually why people get married, Embry.”

“Yeah,” I sighed. “Will I be able to even live up to the image of her husband?”

“Just be yourself, Embry. You don’t want to be the same as her husband. Heck, you don’t even want to replace him. You just want to become ‘her Embry,’ nothing more, nothing less.”